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71)Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long hours that would give you little time with family and friends or a lower-paying job with shorter hours that would give you more time with family and friends? Explain your choice, using specific reason v.2

71)Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long hours that would give you little time with family and friends or a lower-paying job with shorter hours that would give you more time with family and friends? Explain your choice, using specific reason v. 2
The writer of the issue contends that it would be enjoyable to have a job where one works on a three-day basis rather than engaging in a whole traditionally defined work-week. As in many cases, this issue will absorb both its own proponents and detractors. In what follows the main reasons adduced by the two of these groups will be discussed and there after my stance would be delineated. The advocates of such plan may express a number of benefits involved with it including acquirement of plenty of spare time to be fully exploited in variety of ways. In this manner, those who have worked on three-day basis have some quality extra time to be spent with their dear family members or close friends, enjoy recreational and refreshing activities and the like. Nevertheless, they may tend to have a secondary job rather than enjoying and entertaining themselves which in turn could be financially reasonable. The opponents, on the other side, seem to have some other reasons to believe otherwise. They might be concerned about ramifications of such a plan. In their perspective, this will decrease efficacy seriously. This regard, long hours of work may sound excruciating and loss of control or precision could be part of its adverse effects. Furthermore, both private and public sectors need a consistent management. Therefore, this plan would not do justice in higher positions since managers and supervisors should be in close contact with the tide of matters week round, albeit expect for weekends. As for my own stance, I am much inclined to lodge myself somewhere between the two of these postures. Actually, one crucial factor which may not be unraveled to some individuals is that at least we have to consider what type of job herein is open for such a debate. Moreover, some jobs are not that much sensitive and aforementioned plan may seem quite viable. Take the case of janitors, they would find it appealing in order to find other jobs to increase their presumably lower income if they encounter these sorts of propositions. In contrast, some jobs or careers are by nature precarious and this plan may bring about catastrophic consequences. For instance, a pilot needs to work for a limited number of hours. Not to mention, hundreds of lives are at stake. By and large, I think only after keen consideration of associated aspects in each case, we are allowed to detract or praise the possible values of such shortened work weeks.
The writer of the issue contends that it would be enjoyable to have a
job
where one works on a three-day basis
rather
than engaging in a whole
traditionally
defined work-week. As in
many
cases, this issue will absorb both its
own
proponents and detractors. In what follows the main reasons adduced by the two of these groups will
be discussed
and
there after
my stance would
be delineated
.

The advocates of such
plan
may express a number of benefits involved with it including acquirement of
plenty
of spare time to be
fully
exploited in variety of ways. In this manner, those who have worked on three-day basis have
some
quality extra time to
be spent
with their dear family members or close friends, enjoy recreational and refreshing activities and the like.
Nevertheless
, they may tend to have a secondary
job
rather
than enjoying and entertaining themselves which in turn could be
financially
reasonable.

The opponents, on the other side, seem to have
some
other reasons to believe
otherwise
. They might
be concerned
about ramifications of such a
plan
. In their perspective, this will decrease efficacy
seriously
. This regard, long hours of
work
may sound excruciating and loss of control or precision could be part of its adverse effects.
Furthermore
, both private and public sectors need a consistent management.
Therefore
, this
plan
would not do justice in higher positions since managers and supervisors should be in close contact with the tide of matters week round, albeit
expect
for weekends.

As for my
own
stance, I am much inclined to lodge myself somewhere between the two of these postures. Actually, one crucial factor which may not
be unraveled
to
some
individuals is that at least we
have to
consider what type of
job
herein is open for such a debate.
Moreover
,
some
jobs
are not that much sensitive and aforementioned
plan
may seem quite viable. Take the case of janitors, they would find it appealing in order to find other
jobs
to increase their presumably lower income if they encounter these sorts of propositions.
In contrast
,
some
jobs
or careers are by nature precarious and this
plan
may bring about catastrophic consequences.
For instance
, a pilot needs to
work
for a limited number of hours. Not to mention, hundreds of
lives
are at stake. By and large, I
think
only
after keen consideration of associated aspects in each case, we are
allowed
to detract or praise the possible values of such shortened
work
weeks.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay 71)Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long hours that would give you little time with family and friends or a lower-paying job with shorter hours that would give you more time with family and friends? Explain your choice, using specific reason v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
413 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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