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Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long hours that would give you little time with family and friends or a lower-paying job with shorter hours that would give you more time with family and friends? Explain your choice, using specific reasons v.2

Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long hours that would give you little time with family and friends or a lower-paying job with shorter hours that would give you more time with family and friends? Explain your choice, using specific reasons v. 2
Government is the main body that is responsible for the overall development of the nation by investing in different infrastructures like health, transportation, etc. Among them, transportation is the major infrastructure for the development. Railways and roadways are two major modes of land transportation, but there is a debate whether to invest more in railways or roadways among people. Investment in both railways and roadways are essential and are being discussed further. Firstly, railways are one of the most popular means of transportations and its popularity. Thereafter, the government must invest more in railways which are much faster than roadways. Also, railways can be more environmentally friendly and sustainable if it is studied properly before construction. Electric trains can eliminate the environmental pollution which is being caused by petroleum products. Usually, trains are massive and large that have high load capacity and can carry a number of people at a time. Therefore, the work efficiency of railways is much more than roadways. On the other side, roadways are much cheaper to build than railways. Roadways can be constructed easily with less manpower and less equipments. Similarly, roadways are convenient for all people of different age groups due to its easy availability and more options like private vehicles, public buses, trams etc. Roadways are the most popular means of transport in developing countries because the railways are much expensive in its early construction and even in terms of utilities, roadways are more convenient and affordable. After analysing varieties of points, I reckon that both railways and roadways have their own significance in the overall development of the nation. Railways are more effective in more developed countries, while roadways are best suited for developing countries. Hence, the government must invest in both railways and roadways according to the need of the people, economy and geographical topographies.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
is the main body
that is
responsible for the
overall
development of the nation by investing in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
infrastructures like health,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
, etc. Among them,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
is the major infrastructure for the development.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Railways
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
are two major modes of land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there is a debate whether to invest more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Investment in both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
are essential and are
being discussed
further
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are one of the most popular means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportations
and its popularity. Thereafter, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
invest more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
which are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
faster than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
can be more
environmentally
friendly and sustainable if it
is studied
properly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
construction. Electric trains can eliminate the environmental pollution which is
being caused
by petroleum products.
Usually
, trains are massive and large that have high load capacity and can carry a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
at a time.
Therefore
, the work efficiency of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
more than roadways.

On the other side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
cheaper to build than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Roadways
can
be constructed
easily
with less manpower and
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun equipments is countable.
less
equipments.
Similarly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
are convenient for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
age groups due to its easy availability and more options like private vehicles, public buses, trams etc.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Roadways
are the most popular means of transport in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
expensive in its early construction and even in terms of utilities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
are more convenient and affordable.

After
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
varieties of points, I reckon that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
significance in the
overall
development of the nation.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Railways
are more effective in more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
are best suited for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
.
Hence
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
invest in both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roadways
according to the need of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, economy and geographical topographies.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long hours that would give you little time with family and friends or a lower-paying job with shorter hours that would give you more time with family and friends? Explain your choice, using specific reasons v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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