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#7 How do movies or television influence people's behavior? use reasons and specific examples to support your answer. v.1

#7 How do movies or television influence people's behavior? use reasons and specific examples to support your answer. v. 1
Movies or television have given big influences to the lives of most of us. We spend a lot of hours every week watching movies on DVD or television programs without noticing it, so of course it will affect our behavior. Unfortunately, according to some surveys, it is often said that the effect of movies or television is usually negative. A certain survey shows that television makes people more violent, more inactive, and less imaginative as follows. Firstly, many televison programs or movies are violent because it is one of the easiest ways to catch a lot of viewer's attention. The more we s. . .
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Movies
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
influences to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of most of us. We spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
hours every week watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
on DVD or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
programs without noticing it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
of course
it will affect our behavior. Unfortunately, according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
surveys, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
said that the effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
. A certain survey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more violent, more inactive, and less imaginative as follows.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
televison
programs or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
are violent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is one of the easiest ways to catch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
viewer's attention. The more we s.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay #7 How do movies or television influence people's behavior? use reasons and specific examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
104 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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