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61. Some people think that wildlife does not belong outside of its natural habitat. They do not think that zoos should exist. Others believe that zoos serve an educational purpose that is more important than the rights of the wild animals. Which side of t v.1

61. Some people think that wildlife does not belong outside of its natural habitat. They do not think that zoos should exist. Others believe that zoos serve an educational purpose that is more important than the rights of the wild animals. Which side of t v. 1
There is an opinion that,  primarily, staff members who have devoted many years to working for a particular company should be given executive positions in a company.  I disagree with this viewpoint as younger workers may have more advanced skills, and if not provided with an opportunity for a promotion, they will become demotivated. Although senior employees have proved to be reliable and loyal, more often than not, it is novices who have a wider cluster of actual skills.  This is because young specialists exert their full effort in mastering their hard and soft skills to meet the requirements of today’s highly competitive job market.  Therefore, having been promoted, such workers may bring innovation and help to better incorporate the latest technological advances into business processes, which is irreplaceable for every company to flourish.  For example,  the average age of a new hire at Facebook is only 23, for this very purpose. Yet another reason why less experienced staff members should have even chances for a promotion is that otherwise they will not be motivated to do their best. Knowing that however hard they try, they still will not be given a higher position in a company, since young employees are likely to grow reluctant to go the extra mile, which may negatively affect a company’s revenue and curb its development. In conclusion, even though individuals who have worked fewer years for a particular company might be less trustworthy, they should be equally promoted as they have up-to-date knowledge and skillsets.  Besides that, this will encourage them to apply their abilities to the fullest,  thus contributing to the prosperity of a company.
There is an opinion that,
 
primarily
, staff members who have devoted
many
years to working for a particular
company
should be
given
executive positions in a
company
.  I disagree with this viewpoint as younger workers may have more advanced
skills
, and if not provided with an opportunity for a promotion, they will become demotivated.

Although senior employees have proved to be reliable and loyal, more
often
than not, it is novices who have a wider cluster of actual
skills
.  This is
because
 young specialists exert their full effort in mastering their
hard
and soft
skills
to
meet
the requirements of
today
’s
highly
competitive job market.  
Therefore
, having
been promoted
, such workers may bring innovation and
help
to better incorporate the latest technological advances into business processes, which is irreplaceable for every
company
to flourish.  
For example
,
 
the average age of a new hire at Facebook is
only
23, for this
very
purpose.

Yet
another reason why less experienced staff members should have even chances for a promotion is that
otherwise
they will not
be motivated
to do their best. Knowing that
however
hard
they try, they
still
will not be
given
a higher position in a
company
, since young employees are likely to grow reluctant to go the extra mile, which may
negatively
affect a
company’s
revenue and curb its development.

In conclusion
,
even though
 individuals who have worked fewer years for a particular
company
might be less trustworthy, they should be
equally
promoted as they have up-to-date knowledge and
skillsets
.  
Besides
that, this will encourage them to apply their abilities to the fullest,
 
thus
 contributing to the prosperity of a
company
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 61. Some people think that wildlife does not belong outside of its natural habitat. They do not think that zoos should exist. Others believe that zoos serve an educational purpose that is more important than the rights of the wild animals. Which side of t v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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