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1. Some people think that wildlife does not belong outside of its natural habitat. They do not think that zoos should exist. Others believe that zoos serve an educational purpose that is more important than the rights of the wild animals. Which side of thi v.1

1. Some people think that wildlife does not belong outside of its natural habitat. They do not think that zoos should exist. Others believe that zoos serve an educational purpose that is more important than the rights of the wild animals. Which side of thi v. 1
It is argued that environmental problems are massive and laborious for countries and people to handle individually and requires collective global intervention to tackle it. This essay disagrees with the argument completely as environmental problems can be approached from the grassroots. The essay will first look at how public awareness of environmental protection and intentional government intervention through environmental laws, sanctions and penalties can reduce degradation in the ecosystem. Firstly, public awareness of environmental protection through media campaigns and inclusion in school curriculum, can educate the populace about the dangers of polluting the environment. Many citizens are not aware of the impact of their individual actions on the environment. For instance, the recent social media wave on global warming in America and most of Europe has had a behavioural impact on many people and have changed the way a lot of them go about their daily activities, putting environmental protection in the forefront. Additionally, the government in each country, can be more intentional about preserving the environment by creating localised environmental laws. These laws should include sanctions and penalties for erring individuals, thereby discouraging hostile behaviours. For example, environmental law that banned gas flaring in Nigeria, has resulted in gas companies' multi-million dollar investment in gas processing thereby reducing gas pollution. In conclusion, dissemination of important information about environmental protection to the public and the conscious effort of government agencies to establish functional laws will go a long way in solving many environmental issues we have today. Like the popular saying charity begins at home. Similarly, If each country tackle this issue locally, the aggregated result will be unprecedented.
It
is argued
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems are massive and laborious for countries and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to handle
individually
and requires collective global intervention to tackle it. This essay disagrees with the argument completely as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems can
be approached
from the grassroots. The essay will
first
look at how public awareness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protection
and intentional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
intervention through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
, sanctions and penalties can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
degradation in the ecosystem.

Firstly
, public awareness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protection
through media campaigns and inclusion in school curriculum, can educate the populace about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
of polluting the environment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
citizens are not aware of the impact of their individual actions on the environment.
For instance
, the recent social media wave on global warming in America and most of Europe has had a
Possible spelling mistake. 'behavioural' is British English.
behavioural
impact on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
them go about their daily activities, putting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protection
in the forefront.

Additionally
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in each country, can be more intentional about preserving the environment by creating
Possible spelling mistake. 'localised' is British English.
localised
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
should include sanctions and penalties for erring individuals, thereby discouraging hostile
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
that banned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
flaring in Nigeria, has resulted in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
' multi-million dollar investment in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
processing thereby reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
pollution.

In conclusion
, dissemination of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protection
to the public and the conscious effort of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
agencies to establish functional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
will go a long way in solving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
issues we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. Like the popular saying charity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
at home.
Similarly
, If each country tackle this issue
locally
, the aggregated result will
be unprecedented
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 1. Some people think that wildlife does not belong outside of its natural habitat. They do not think that zoos should exist. Others believe that zoos serve an educational purpose that is more important than the rights of the wild animals. Which side of thi v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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