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21. Some people prefer to work in the offices. Others would like to take the workto home. Which do you prefer and explain why. v.1

21. Some people prefer to work in the offices. Others would like to take the workto home. Which do you prefer and explain why. v. 1
In recent years, there has been a growing trend towards living in flats among citizens in urban cities. Although this trend is not without advantages, the downsides will justify these. On the one hand, it is evident that living in apartments offers a myriad of benefits among which the primary one is the affordable price for accommodation. Due to the baby boom in the metropolis, land is becoming increasingly exorbitant. Therefore, an apartment which crams a vast number of residents into a small place makes cost to live here reasonable, thus, enables low-income people to live near both the city’s hub and their workplaces. Additionally, thanks to security guards and devices, it is obvious that blocks bestow dwellers with safeguarding. This is because they can monitor what is happening in the vicinity through CCTV or be protected from thieves by guards. However, I believe that the negative implications of this trend far eclipse its positive impacts mentioned above. Firstly, residents will face a host of adversities while evacuating from fire or natural disasters. For example, if a fire broke out, they would easily be stuck on the top floors. Secondly, because of the cramped environment of the apartment, it will cause infectious diseases to spread more quickly. Furthermore, since apartment may lack of space, it provides no space for exercise. Thereby, creating a major health risk. In conclusion, given that large blocks of flats furnish city dwellers with a cheaper living option, they bring a number of drawbacks in terms of not only lower quality accommodation with confined space but also health risks.
In recent years, there has been a growing trend towards living in flats among citizens in urban cities. Although this trend is not without advantages, the downsides will justify these.

On the one hand, it is evident that living in
apartments
offers a myriad of benefits among which the primary one is the affordable price for accommodation. Due to the baby boom in the metropolis, land is becoming
increasingly
exorbitant.
Therefore
, an
apartment
which crams a vast number of residents into a
small
place
makes
cost to
live
here reasonable,
thus
, enables low-income
people
to
live
near both the city’s hub and their workplaces.
Additionally
, thanks to security guards and devices, it is obvious that blocks bestow dwellers with safeguarding. This is
because
they can monitor what is happening in the vicinity through CCTV or
be protected
from thieves by guards.

However
, I believe that the
negative
implications of this trend far eclipse its
positive
impacts mentioned above.
Firstly
, residents will face a host of adversities while evacuating from fire or natural disasters.
For example
, if a fire broke out, they would
easily
be stuck
on the top floors.
Secondly
,
because
of the cramped environment of the
apartment
, it will cause infectious diseases to spread more
quickly
.
Furthermore
, since
apartment
may lack of space, it provides no space for exercise. Thereby, creating a major health
risk
.

In conclusion
,
given
that large blocks of flats furnish city dwellers with a cheaper living option, they bring a number of drawbacks in terms of not
only
lower quality accommodation with confined space
but
also
health
risks
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 21. Some people prefer to work in the offices. Others would like to take the workto home. Which do you prefer and explain why. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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