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1656 Describe a rule in school you agree or disagree withWhat the rule isWhy it is neededHow the rule is enforcedand explain why you agree of disagree with this rule v.1

1656 Describe a rule in school you agree or disagree withWhat the rule isWhy it is neededHow the rule is enforcedand explain why you agree of disagree with this rule v. 1
These days, there has been an ongoing argument that punishment is essential to teach children about the right and wrong they should do. I take the view that this idea is relatively compelling. There is a plethora of convincing reasons to punish a child when they do something wrong. Children need to know what they can and cannot do such as disobey or not going school. Every parent always gives for their offsprings the best thing they have as well as teaches them to be good citizens. However, sometimes, punishing is very important because if we ignore these mistakes, they are prone to repeat it as well as become disobedient. Therefore, punishing on a proper basis could rectify their wrong and teach them to avoid repeating. However, punishing a child necessitate delicacy to avoid hurting them. My own view is that parents or teachers should not apply to physical punishment such as using a rod or slapping. In Asia, for example, some parents still use the rod to penalize their children; however, this measure is being condemned by the authority because it leads to increasing the suicide rates in youngsters. This evidence supports that these punishments are not necessarily right, but trigger some pain in children’s souls, which will never be alleviated. I advocate for minor punishment such as cutting down the money for children when they spend this money on playing video games without learning or doing homework. Besides, parents or teachers could penalize them to do household chores or clean the class; by the way, the children also learn the way to keep houses or classroom tidy. All in all, in my point of view, punishing is essential to teach the children, but we need to consider deliberately before penalizing as well as apply the appropriate penalty.
These days, there has been an ongoing argument that
punishment
is essential to
teach
children
about the right and
wrong
they should do. I take the view that this
idea
is
relatively
compelling.

There is a plethora of convincing reasons to punish a child when they do something
wrong
.
Children
need to know what they can and cannot do such as disobey or not going school. Every
parent
always gives for their
offsprings
the best thing they have
as well
as
teaches
them to be
good
citizens.
However
,
sometimes
,
punishing
is
very
important
because
if we
ignore
these mistakes, they are prone to repeat it
as well
as become disobedient.
Therefore
,
punishing
on a proper basis could rectify their
wrong
and
teach
them to avoid repeating.

However
,
punishing
a child necessitate delicacy to avoid hurting them. My
own
view is that
parents
or teachers should not apply to physical
punishment
such as using a rod or slapping. In Asia,
for example
,
some
parents
still
use
the rod to penalize their
children
;
however
, this measure is
being condemned
by the authority
because
it leads to increasing the suicide rates in youngsters. This evidence supports that these
punishments
are not
necessarily
right,
but
trigger
some
pain in
children’s
souls, which will never
be alleviated
.

I advocate for minor
punishment
such as cutting down the money for
children
when they spend this money on playing video games without learning or doing homework.
Besides
,
parents
or teachers could penalize them to do household chores or clean the
class
; by the way, the
children
also
learn the way to
keep
houses
or classroom tidy.

All in all, in my point of view,
punishing
is essential to
teach
the
children
,
but
we need to consider
deliberately
before
penalizing
as well
as apply the appropriate penalty.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay 1656 Describe a rule in school you agree or disagree withWhat the rule isWhy it is neededHow the rule is enforcedand explain why you agree of disagree with this rule v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
299 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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