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1244 Describe an event that made you happy. You should sayWhat the event wasWhen and where it happenedWho participated in this eventWhat you saw or didAnd explain why this event was so enjoyable v.1

1244 Describe an event that made you happy. You should sayWhat the event wasWhen and where it happenedWho participated in this eventWhat you saw or didAnd explain why this event was so enjoyable v. 1
Nowadays, there is a dramatic increase in the usage of the animal to fulfil human needs. Some people claim that animals also hold the same right to live, and this is why a human being should stop using them for their wishes, while others argue that there is no alternative to the use of animal for certain purposes like for consumption and essential scientific experiments. This essay will discuss both views and will come up with the conclusion. Every living organism on this earth has the same privilege to fight for life. The animal serves various purposes which help other living creatures in tremendous ways, for instance, eggs from chicken used by the human for eating. Animals are speechless and cannot express their anger and dissatisfaction while they abused by the humans. If people continuously exploit animals for their own needs, then shortly we may lose some important species of animal. So, it is the responsibility of people to be empathetic with innocent beastly and protect them. On the other hand, there are certain tasks which require the use of animal, For example, as a mean of the research sample. There are various scientific laboratories and pharmaceutical research centres which uses the rabbit or the mice to test the effectiveness of the certain drugs or methods on them, before implementing it on other living organisms. In a situation like this, it is unavoidable to use them because they represent similar characteristics as a human does. Although, animal act as a useful mean in certain activities, I believe that we should respect their dignity to live, and only use them in the situation, where there is no better alternative is available. For example, one can avoid hunting wild creature for the hobby, or people can also switch to the other options for the food rather than killing aphonic creatures. To conclude, to save the precious heritage of our animal species, human should move towards finding the best resources to fulfil their needs and respect the right of the speechless animals. They should only be used in circumstances where using other alternatives may lead to the worst impact.
Nowadays, there is a dramatic increase in the usage of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
to fulfil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
needs.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
also
hold the same right to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, and this is why a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
being should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
using them for their wishes, while others argue that there is no alternative to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
purposes like for consumption and essential scientific experiments. This essay will discuss both views and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with the conclusion.

Every living organism on this earth has the same privilege to fight for life. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
serves various purposes which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
living creatures in tremendous ways,
for instance
, eggs from chicken
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
for eating.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Animals
are speechless and cannot express their anger and dissatisfaction while they abused by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
continuously
exploit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
needs, then shortly we may lose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it is the responsibility of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be empathetic with innocent
beastly
and protect them.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
tasks which require the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
,
For example
, as a mean of the research sample. There are various scientific laboratories and pharmaceutical research
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
the rabbit or the mice to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
the effectiveness of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
drugs or methods on them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
implementing it on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
living organisms. In a situation like this, it is unavoidable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they represent similar characteristics as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
does. Although,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
act as a useful mean in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
activities, I believe that we should respect their dignity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them in the situation, where there is no better alternative is available.
For example
, one can avoid hunting wild creature for the hobby, or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
also
switch to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
options for the food
rather
than killing
Possible spelling mistake found.
aphonic
creatures.

To conclude
, to save the precious heritage of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
species,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
towards finding the best resources to fulfil their needs and respect the right of the speechless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. They should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in circumstances where using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
alternatives may lead to the worst impact.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay 1244 Describe an event that made you happy. You should sayWhat the event wasWhen and where it happenedWho participated in this eventWhat you saw or didAnd explain why this event was so enjoyable v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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