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1163 describe something healthy you enjoy doingyou should saywhat you dowhere you do itwho you do it withand explain why you think doing this is healthy v.1

1163 describe something healthy you enjoy doingyou should saywhat you dowhere you do itwho you do it withand explain why you think doing this is healthy v. 1
In the present age, whether single-sex schools provide more benefits than mixed schools has sparked much debate. Some people assert that students in single-sex schools have better academic achievements, whereas many others argue that mixed schools offer students better social skills for their future. Personally, I am in favour of the latter view. Convincing arguments can be made that mixed schools provide a more comprehensive learning environment for children. To start with, students studying at mixed schools have more chances to communicate with members of the opposite sex. In other words, children learn how to talk to the other gender at an early age; therefore, their social skills would certainly be fostered. Moreover, mixed schools give students opportunities to deal with conflicts with the other gender, which strengthens students’ problem-solving skills. For instance, when a boy has a conflict with a girl at school, both of them must learn how to cope. This lesson must be learned sooner or later; as a result, students benefit more if they can learn it sooner. Lastly, mixed schools provides students with a real-life scenario where both genders co-exist. Specifically, students are able to learn in an organic environment in which boys and girls must know how to interact with each other. Admittedly, single-sex schools have fewer distractions. The reason for this is if a school only has boys or girls, students would not be distracted by members of the opposite sex at school; hence, they can focus on their learning. Even so, these students still have access to The other gender after school, which means in reality, they must meet the other gender anyway. Consequently, the benefits of single-sex schools are quite limited. In summary, I would concede that single-sex schools have some advantages. Despite that, mixed schools certainly support students in a much better way. Overall, I am convinced that students should go to mixed schools.
In the present age, whether single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
provide more benefits than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
has sparked much debate.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assert that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have better academic achievements, whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
offer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
better social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for their future.
Personally
, I am in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of the latter view.

Convincing arguments can
be made
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
provide a more comprehensive learning environment for children. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
studying at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have more chances to communicate with members of the opposite sex. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to talk to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
gender at an early age;
therefore
, their social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
would
certainly
be fostered
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
opportunities to deal with conflicts with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
gender, which strengthens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
problem-solving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For instance
, when a boy has a conflict with a girl at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, both of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to cope. This lesson
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be learned
sooner or later;
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
benefit more if they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
it sooner.
Lastly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with a real-life scenario where both genders co-exist.
Specifically
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
in an organic environment in which boys and girls
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know how to interact with each other.

Admittedly
, single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have fewer distractions.
The reason for this is
if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has boys or girls,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
would not
be distracted
by members of the opposite sex at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
;
hence
, they can focus on their learning. Even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
still
have access to

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
gender after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, which means in reality, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
gender anyway.
Consequently
, the benefits of single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are quite limited.

In summary, I would concede that single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages. Despite that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
certainly
support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in a much better way.
Overall
, I
am convinced
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 1163 describe something healthy you enjoy doingyou should saywhat you dowhere you do itwho you do it withand explain why you think doing this is healthy v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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