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10. Where is a good place to have fun in your city or town? Describe this placeand explain why it is fun. v.1

10. Where is a good place to have fun in your city or town? Describe this placeand explain why it is fun. v. 1
There is no doubt that living in foreign countries is becoming increasingly prevalent. However, the question: can this be accompanied by problems? Is one of the most controversial issues. There are some people who think that doing so can cause many practical and social problems. I completely agree with this argument and I will support my view in this essay. To begin with, those who believe staying abroad can cause many problems might argue that it can lead to misunderstanding. This is because people who can not speak the language of this country may not be able to voice their opinion or choices. For example, when I was in Italy, I was unable to read a restaurant's menu or speak with a waiter. As a consequence, I stayed a long time waiting for a person who can speak my language. In contrast, If people speak the same language as citizens, they will not struggle with such issues. Moreover, I would also think that there are a lot of social issues can be caused when living in a foreign country. For instance, you may be unable to socialize and make new friends. Furthermore, you can face difficulty in understanding a country's cultures and traditions. However, if travelers are able to understand the traditions and cultures of a foreign country, this will contribute to cultural convergence. In conclusion, despite the fact that living in another country can have some benefits, such as earning a relatively high income, I totally agree that this can trigger many matters.
There is no doubt that living in foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is becoming
increasingly
prevalent.
However
, the question: can this
be accompanied
by problems? Is one of the most controversial issues. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
practical and social problems. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this argument and I will support my view in this essay.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
believe staying abroad can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems might argue that it can lead to misunderstanding. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
can not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
speak
the language of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
may not be able to voice their opinion or choices.
For example
, when I was in Italy, I was unable to read a restaurant's menu or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
speak
with a waiter. As a consequence, I stayed a long time waiting for a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
speak
my language.
In contrast
, If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
speak
the same language as citizens, they will not struggle with such issues.

Moreover
, I would
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
social issues can
be caused
when living in a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For instance
, you may be unable to socialize and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new friends.
Furthermore
, you can face difficulty in understanding a country's cultures and traditions.
However
, if travelers are able to understand the traditions and cultures of a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, this will contribute to cultural convergence.

In conclusion
, despite the fact that living in another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits, such as earning a
relatively
high income, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that this can trigger
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
matters.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 10. Where is a good place to have fun in your city or town? Describe this placeand explain why it is fun. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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