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1. B. Nowadays, people are spending increasingly large amounts of money on their marriage parties. Many people feel large and expensive weddings cause problems for the bride and groom. Do you agree? Use personal examples in your response. v.2

1. B. Nowadays, people are spending increasingly large amounts of money on their marriage parties. Many people feel large and expensive weddings cause problems for the bride and groom. Do you agree? Use personal examples in your response. v. 2
These days, many people spend extraordinary funds on their wedding ceremonies. However, some people believe that it is not a good trend to follow. I completely agree with this school of thought, as these lavish parties create numerous problems for the families involved. Firstly, it is needless to say that marriage ceremonies have become a status symbol, and many people pour huge sums of money to maintain their social status. Consequently, they are not only exhausting their life savings, but also borrow funds from financial institutions on high markup rates. In a recent article published by Ms. Farhat Hashmi, a social activist, it was stated that 6 out of 10 loans sanctioned from commercial banks were used for matrimonial purposes. Secondly, an ever-increasing number of unmarried individuals are alarming for the society. In other words, youngsters who have attained the age of marriage are not getting married because of their feeble financial background. For example, in many Asian countries, dowry is considered as one of the principal reasons for girls not getting married. In conclusion, although marriage is an important occasion and can be remembered for a lifetime. Nonetheless, we need to understand the importance of money, and I believe that it should not be spent frivolously. It is predicted, however, that in the future, the Government will impose more restrictions to avoid dowry-related practices.
These days,
many
people
spend extraordinary funds on their wedding ceremonies.
However
,
some
people
believe that it is not a
good
trend to follow. I completely
agree
with this school of
thought
, as these lavish parties create numerous problems for the families involved.

Firstly
, it is needless to say that marriage ceremonies have become a status symbol, and
many
people
pour huge sums of money to maintain their social status.
Consequently
, they are not
only
exhausting their life savings,
but
also
borrow funds from financial institutions on high markup rates. In a recent article published by Ms.
Farhat
Hashmi
, a social activist, it
was stated
that 6 out of 10 loans sanctioned from commercial banks were
used
for matrimonial purposes.

Secondly
, an ever-increasing number of unmarried individuals are alarming for the society.
In other words
, youngsters who have attained the age of marriage are not getting married
because
of their feeble financial background.
For example
, in
many
Asian countries, dowry
is considered
as one of the principal reasons for girls not getting married.

In conclusion
, although marriage is an
important
occasion and can
be remembered
for a lifetime. Nonetheless, we need to understand the importance of money, and I believe that it should not
be spent
frivolously
. It
is predicted
,
however
, that in the future, the
Government
will impose more restrictions to avoid dowry-related practices.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay 1. B. Nowadays, people are spending increasingly large amounts of money on their marriage parties. Many people feel large and expensive weddings cause problems for the bride and groom. Do you agree? Use personal examples in your response. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
225 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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