Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons whe v.67

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960.
The maps illustrate the transformation of Queen Mary Hospital at three different stages in its development: 1960, 1980 and 2000. Overall, the hospital became more developed, making use some of the natural resources while extending the hospital scale and providing more options for treatment and medical education. From 1960 to 2000, there are many changes around Queen Mary Hospital. In 1980, a shopping centre in the left of the hospital was dissolved in order to construct two additional hospital building, namely a pharmacy which was located next to this hospital and a cancer centre which was to the left of a pharmacy. In the year 2000, the pharmacy unchanged, while the cancer center was enlarged about three times compared to in 1980. In the bottom left corner of the hospital, farmland was converted into the nursing school in the period from 1960 to 1980. However, in 2000, this school was occupied the entire area by the cancer centre. And then, is this year 2000, the car park, which was in the right of nursing school was divided into two parts so that it provided a smaller car park and a small nursing school.
The maps illustrate the transformation of Queen Mary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
at three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
stages in its development: 1960, 1980 and 2000.

Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
became more developed, making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
natural resources while extending the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
scale and providing more options for treatment and medical education.

From 1960 to 2000, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
around Queen Mary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
. In 1980, a shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
was dissolved
in order to construct two additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
building,
namely
a pharmacy which
was located
next
to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
and a cancer
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
which was to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
of a pharmacy. In the year 2000, the pharmacy unchanged, while the cancer center
was enlarged
about three times compared to in 1980.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
the bottom
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
corner of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
, farmland
was converted
into the nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
in the period from 1960 to 1980.
However
, in 2000, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
was occupied
the entire area by the cancer
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
. And then, is this year 2000, the car park, which was in the right of nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
was divided
into two parts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that it provided a smaller car park and a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS academic The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
193 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts