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The two pie charts below show the percentages of industry sectors contribution to the economy of Turkey in 2000 and 2016 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant v.2

The two pie charts below show the percentages of industry sectors contribution to the economy of Turkey in 2000 and 2016
The pie chart provide information about the sectors that have been important to the conomy of Turkey in 2000 and 2016. First of all, as the first chart shows, the agriculture' s sector had the highest percentage of contribution with 24% in 2000, whereas the construction' s sector represented the lowest percentage with only 3%. However, even several other industry sections contributed to Turkey' s economy, such as Healthcare and Education, Trade, Utilities and Transportation, Leisure and Hospitality and Government with 17%, 14%, 17% and 12% respectively. Also Manufacturing and Finance, Business and Other with 8% and 5% gave their contribution. The second pie chart illustrates how the agriculture' s contribution had a fall of 14% in 2016, while Construction, Manufacturing, Trade, Utilities and Trasportation and Finance, Business and Other sectora had a slight increase reaching 10%, 12%, 16% and 8% respectively. What emerges is that Government and Leisure and Hospitality experienced a slight decrease of 9% and 14% respectively. In addiction, only Healthcare and Education' s section remained stable at 17% in 2016. Overall, the data indicate how the agriculture had a high role to the economy' s development of Turkey in 2000, whereas the Healthcare and Education became the most important sector in 2016.
The pie chart provide information about the
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sectors
that have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to the
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conomy
of Turkey in 2000 and 2016.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, as the
first
chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, the
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agriculture&
#039; s
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sector
had the highest percentage of contribution with 24% in 2000, whereas the
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construction&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
represented the lowest percentage with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
3%.
However
, even several other industry sections contributed to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Turkey&
#039; s economy, such as Healthcare and Education, Trade, Utilities and Transportation, Leisure and Hospitality and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
with 17%, 14%, 17% and 12%
respectively
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
Manufacturing and Finance, Business and Other with 8% and 5% gave their contribution.

The second pie chart illustrates how the
Possible spelling mistake found.
agriculture&
#039; s contribution had a fall of 14% in 2016, while Construction, Manufacturing, Trade, Utilities and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Trasportation
and Finance, Business and Other
Possible spelling mistake found.
sectora
had a slight increase reaching 10%, 12%, 16% and 8%
respectively
. What emerges is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
and Leisure and Hospitality experienced a slight decrease of 9% and 14%
respectively
. In addiction,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Healthcare and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Education&
#039; s section remained stable at 17% in 2016.

Overall
, the data indicate how the agriculture had a high role to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
economy&
#039; s development of Turkey in 2000, whereas the Healthcare and Education became the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
in 2016.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes
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Frank Smith

IELTS academic The two pie charts below show the percentages of industry sectors contribution to the economy of Turkey in 2000 and 2016

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
206 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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