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The table below shows the percentages of people joining in seven different sports in a European country from 1999 to 2009. v.2

The table below shows the percentages of people joining in seven different sports in a European country from 1999 to 2009. v. 2
Given is the table illustrating the modification of the attendance in seven kinds of sport happened in a country between 1999 and 2009. It is clear from the table that football always received the highest percentage of the seven types of sport. By contrast, yoga was the category having a small number of people attended and seemed unchanged during the research time. Standing at the highest point (57%) in 1999, football steadily decreased but it always occupied the largest proportion, while, 32% people swam in 1999, it just increased slightly to 34% and flattened out after 2004. Although tennis did not have the high number of players, it continued a stable climb with slight acceleration from 25% to 33%. As can be seen, there is a mere minority of golf and volleyball; however, they jumped further to 17% and 18% respectively in 2009. Basketball accounted for 26% in 1999 and it experienced a decrease of 26% to 2% of the number of sportsmen in 2009. At the same time, yoga had only 10% in the first 5 years, then, it had a slight lull to 13% in five year’s time.
Given
is the table illustrating the modification of the attendance in seven kinds of sport happened in a country between 1999 and 2009.

It is
clear
from the table that football always received the highest percentage of the seven types of sport. By contrast, yoga was the category having a
small
number of
people
attended and seemed unchanged during the research time.

Standing at the highest point (57%) in 1999, football
steadily
decreased
but
it always occupied the largest proportion, while, 32%
people
swam in 1999, it
just
increased
slightly
to 34% and flattened out after 2004. Although tennis did not have the high number of players, it continued a stable climb with slight acceleration from 25% to 33%.

As can be
seen
, there is a mere minority of golf and volleyball;
however
, they jumped
further
to 17% and 18%
respectively
in 2009. Basketball accounted for 26% in 1999 and it experienced a decrease of 26% to 2% of the number of sportsmen in 2009. At the same time, yoga had
only
10% in the
first
5 years, then, it had a slight lull to 13% in five year’s time.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS academic The table below shows the percentages of people joining in seven different sports in a European country from 1999 to 2009. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
190 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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