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The table below shows the number of kilometres passengers travelled on five types of transport in a European country in 1995, 2005 and 2015. v.3

The table below shows the number of kilometres passengers travelled on five types of transport in a European country in 1995, 2005 and 2015. v. 3
The supplied table data presents information on the distance travelled by passengers in a European country in different modes of transportations from 1995 to 2015. As is given in the illustration, buses and rails were the most preferred transportation types but the air travel gained popularity in recent years. According to the given data, the least number of distance was travelled using bicycles and motorbikes by passengers in this European country. Commuters in this country travelled only 2 billion km. using bicycles in 1995 and it was the same in 2015. Similarly, only 5 billion km were travelled using motorbikes which reached 6 billion after 20 years. Interestingly, the air travels gained huge popularity in later years as 20 billion km distance was passed using aeroplanes in 2015 while this was merely 2 billion km 20 years earlier. Buses and trains were the most preferred transportation types as the highest distance was travelled by the passengers in these two modes of transportation. However, there was an increase in the distance travelled by trains (38  and 60 billion km in 2005 and 2015) while it decreased in the case of the bus (56 and 42 billion km in 2005 and 2015 respectively). The total distance travelled by passengers increased to 130 billion km. in 2015 in this country from 103 billion km. in 1995.
The supplied table data presents information on the
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distance
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travelled
by
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passengers
in a European
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country
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
modes of
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transportations
from 1995 to 2015. As is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in the illustration, buses and rails were the most preferred
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transportation
types
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the air travel gained popularity in recent years.

According to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
data, the least number of
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distance
was
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travelled
using bicycles and motorbikes by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
in this European
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country
. Commuters in this
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country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelled
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2
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billion
km. using bicycles in 1995 and it was the same in 2015.
Similarly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5
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billion
km were
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travelled
using motorbikes which reached 6
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billion
after 20 years.
Interestingly
, the air travels gained huge popularity in later years as 20
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billion
km
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distance
was passed
using
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplanes' is British English.
aeroplanes
in 2015 while this was
merely
2
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billion
km 20 years earlier. Buses and trains were the most preferred
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transportation
types as the highest
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distance
was
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travelled
by the
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passengers
in these two modes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
.
However
, there was an increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
distance
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travelled
by trains (38
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
and 60
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billion
km in 2005 and 2015) while it decreased in the case of the bus (56 and 42
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
km in 2005 and 2015
respectively
).

The total
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distance
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travelled
by
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passengers
increased to 130
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billion
km. in 2015 in this
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country
from 103
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
km. in 1995.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
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Edward De Waal

IELTS academic The table below shows the number of kilometres passengers travelled on five types of transport in a European country in 1995, 2005 and 2015. v. 3

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
223 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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