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The table below shows the cinema viewing figures for films by country, in millions. v.3

The table below shows the cinema viewing figures for films by country, in millions. v. 3
The table compares the number of audiences in millions who enjoyed four types of movies such as action, romance, comedy and horror in four different countries- India, Ireland, New Zealand, and Japan.   The table also shows the audience total for each of the four given countries. The overall trend can be seen that Indian people watch more movies in cinema than people in other three countries, while Japanese people are the least in terms of their number of watching movies in cinema halls. The other significant trend is that the action movies are the most favourable movie type among people in these four countries. The total numbers of viewers are around 30 million and in each country, it is around 7. 5 million. In Japan and India, horror movies are the least popular movie genre- the total number of audience are 2. 5 and 2. 2 million respectively, while comedy movies are the least enjoyed in New Zealand  with the total number of viewers around 3. 9 million. On the other hand, romance movies are less popular in Ireland but in India, they are the second favourable movies. From this evidence, we can conclude that horror movies are the least preferred movies then the comedy in the second least preferred type while action movies are the most popular and romance movies in the second most watched movies.
The table compares the
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number
of audiences in
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millions
who enjoyed four types of
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movies
such as action, romance, comedy and horror in four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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countries-
India, Ireland, New Zealand, and Japan.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
The table
also
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shows
the audience
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total
for each of the four
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
countries.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
overall
trend can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that Indian
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
in cinema than
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people
in other three
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countries
, while Japanese
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people
are the least in terms of their
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number
of watching
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movies
in cinema halls.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
other significant trend is that the action
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movies
are the most
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
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movie
type among
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people
in these four
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countries
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
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total
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numbers
of viewers are around 30
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million
and in each
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country
, it is around 7. 5
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million
. In Japan and India, horror
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movies
are the least popular
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movie
genre- the
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total
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number
of audience are 2. 5 and 2. 2
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million
respectively
, while comedy
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movies
are the least enjoyed in New Zealand
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
with the
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total
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number
of viewers around 3. 9 million.

On the other hand
, romance
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movies
are less popular in Ireland
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in India, they are the second
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. From this evidence, we can conclude that horror
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movies
are the least preferred
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movies
then the comedy in the second least preferred type while action
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movies
are the most popular and romance
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movies
in the second most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
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movies
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS academic The table below shows the cinema viewing figures for films by country, in millions. v. 3

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
228 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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