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The table below gives information about population in Australia and Malaysia in 198o and 2002. Summarise information and make comparison which relevant. v.2

The table below gives information about population in Australia and Malaysia in 198o and 2002.
The table compares data about actual situations of population in two distinct areas Australia and Malaysia in the years 1998 and 2002 in terms of six aspects. Overall, while a total number of population increased significantly in both countries during this period, there was an opposite trend between proportion of male and female. This was also some differences in the percentage of birth, average yearly growth of population and aging population. After 22 years, the population size of both nations raised considerably. In detailed, in Australia, the proportion of population increased from 14. 7 million in 1980 to 19. 6 million in 2002 whilst this figure in Malaysia in 2002 nearly doubled compared with its previous data, reaching 24. 3 million. Regarding of the rate of men and women, Australia witnessed a steady proportion in both indicators while these statistics in Malaysia fluctuated 0, 3%. There was a decrease in the rate of birth by 0, 2% and 1% in Australia and Malaysia properly. Average annual proportion growth in Australia has up trend slightly by 0, 1%, in contrast, this rate of Malaysia declined from 2, 4% to 2, 1%. When making comparision about the number of people who are aver 65 years old, it is clearly seen that this figure in both Australia and Malaysia rosed substantially by 2, 8% and 0, 6% respectively.
The table compares data about actual situations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in two distinct areas Australia and Malaysia in the years 1998 and 2002 in terms of six aspects.

Overall
, while a total number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
increased
significantly
in both countries during this period, there was an opposite trend between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of male and female. This was
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
differences in the percentage of birth, average yearly growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and aging population.

After 22 years, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
size of both nations raised
considerably
. In detailed, in Australia, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
increased from 14. 7 million in 1980 to 19. 6 million in 2002 whilst this figure in Malaysia in 2002
nearly
doubled compared with its previous data, reaching 24. 3 million. Regarding of the rate of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women, Australia witnessed a steady
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
in both indicators while these statistics in Malaysia fluctuated 0, 3%.

There was a decrease in the rate of birth by 0, 2% and 1% in Australia and Malaysia
properly
. Average annual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
growth in Australia has up trend
slightly
by 0, 1%,
in contrast
, this rate of Malaysia declined from 2, 4% to 2, 1%. When making
Possible spelling mistake found.
comparision
about the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are aver 65 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
, it is
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that this figure in both Australia and Malaysia
Possible spelling mistake found.
rosed
substantially
by 2, 8% and 0, 6%
respectively
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS academic The table below gives information about population in Australia and Malaysia in 198o and 2002.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
225 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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