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The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002 Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category 2002 v.1

The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002 Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category 2002 v. 1
The given table provides an overview concerning the information about consumer expenditure in percentage wise on numerous categories in Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey in the year 2002. Overall, it is noticeable that people from these countries spent much on food, drink and tobacco while consumer expenditure level in leisure and education is the lowest. At first glance, it can be seen that Turkey holds the leading position in food, drinks and tobacco as well as leisure and education with 32. 14% and 4. 35% accordingly while Sweden and Spain had the lowest proportion of consumer expenditure in these two categories with 15. 77% and 1. 98% respectively. The proportion of national consumer expenditure in Ireland is 28. 91% which makes it second highest spending country in this sector whereas with 3. 22% of national consumer expenditure, Sweden holds the same position in the category of leisure and education. Meanwhile Italy had the highest percentage of national consumer expenditure in clothing and footwear followed by Turkey with 9. 00% and 6. 63% successively while consumer expenditure level in Ireland and Spain is almost similar with 6. 43% and 6. 51% accordingly.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
table provides an overview concerning the information about
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consumer
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expenditure
in percentage wise on numerous categories in Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey in the year 2002.

Overall
, it is noticeable that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from these countries spent much on food, drink and tobacco while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditure
level in leisure and education is the lowest.

At
first
glance, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that Turkey holds the leading position in food, drinks and tobacco
as well
as leisure and education with 32. 14% and 4. 35%
accordingly
while Sweden and Spain had the lowest proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditure
in these two categories with 15. 77% and 1. 98%
respectively
. The proportion of national
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consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditure
in Ireland is 28. 91% which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it second highest spending country in this sector whereas with 3. 22% of national
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consumer
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expenditure
, Sweden holds the same position in the category of leisure and education.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Meanwhile
Italy had the highest percentage of national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
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expenditure
in clothing and footwear followed by Turkey with 9. 00% and 6. 63%
successively
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditure
level in Ireland and Spain is almost similar with 6. 43% and 6. 51%
accordingly
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS academic The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002 Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category 2002 v. 1

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
192 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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