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the street plans below show a residential area with a park and playground in 2016 and the proposed changes for 2025 to make it safer for families and children v.2

the street plans below show a residential area with a park and playground in 2016 and the proposed changes for 2025 to make it safer for families and children v. 2
The plans illustrate the comparison of current street of residential district with a park and playground in the year 2016 and the suggested changes, to improve the quality of safety of local families and children, that could be done in the year 2025. Overall, the diverse modifications will be done to all major components on the road, suchlike replacement, addition and remove. Evidently, the bigger proposed changes will have been done to the major junction by 2025. While street plan by the year 2025 proposed adding zebra crossing to the Staple road, also railings will be introduced on the both sides of High road near the entrance of park with playground, in the northeast and southeast, respectively. In addition to this, to the south of the area, four new traffic lights should be installed for four streets, Tennis st, Bridge st, Bond Way and Hatton Avenue. With regards to the major junction of the streets, that mentioned above, it suggested to replace it with roundabout. However, community will no longer see the residential area on the east part of roundabout, due to the fact, that it will be removed.
The plans illustrate the comparison of
current
street
of residential district with a park and playground in the year 2016 and the suggested
changes
, to
improve
the quality of safety of local families and children, that could
be done
in the year 2025.

Overall
, the diverse modifications will
be done
to all major components on the road, suchlike replacement, addition and remove.
Evidently
, the bigger proposed
changes
will have
been done
to the major junction by 2025.

While
street
plan by the year 2025 proposed adding zebra crossing to the Staple road,
also
railings will
be introduced
on the both sides of High road near the entrance of park with playground, in the northeast and southeast,
respectively
.
In addition
to this, to the south of the area, four new traffic lights should
be installed
for four
streets
, Tennis st, Bridge st, Bond Way and
Hatton
Avenue.

With regards to
the major junction of the
streets
, that mentioned above, it
suggested to replace
it with roundabout.
However
, community will no longer
see
the residential area on the east part of roundabout, due to the fact, that it will
be removed
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
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IELTS academic the street plans below show a residential area with a park and playground in 2016 and the proposed changes for 2025 to make it safer for families and children v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
189 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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