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The pie charts compare the percentage of carbohydrates, protein and fat with three different diet programs. v.1

The pie charts compare the percentage of carbohydrates, protein and fat with three different diet programs. v. 1
The chart depicts proportion of carbohydrates, protein and fat associated with three different diet programs. The mentioned parameters are average diet, healthy diet and healthy diet for sport. It is clear from the diagram that people engaged in sports activities required to take a healthy sport diet consisting of high amount of carbohydrate (60%). whereas, folks who follow healthy diet gets 50% carbohydrate followed by 40% carbohydrate intake by persons who practice average diet life style. In contrast, protein content shows the exact reverse trend. Where average diet practitioners consumes high amount of protein of 40% followed by healthy diet and healthy diet for sport practitioners. Which accounts to 30% and 25% respectively. A noticeable fact is that, the fat content in all three diet programs are very less. it is almost equal (20%) in average diet and healthy diet practice followed by healthy diet for sport (15%). In conclusion, all the three diet practices are helpful in maintaining healthy life style. but choice of option clearly depends up on personal choice and interest.
The chart depicts proportion of
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carbohydrates
, protein and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
associated with three
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different
diet programs. The mentioned parameters are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
diet,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet for sport.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from the diagram that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
engaged in
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sports
activities required to take a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
diet consisting of high amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbohydrate
(60%).
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whereas
, folks who follow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
50%
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carbohydrate
followed by 40%
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carbohydrate
intake by persons who practice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
diet life style.

In contrast
, protein content
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the exact reverse trend. Where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
diet practitioners consumes high amount of protein of 40% followed by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet for
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sport
practitioners. Which accounts to 30% and 25%
respectively
.

A noticeable fact is that, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
content in all three diet programs are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is almost equal (20%) in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet practice followed by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
(15%).

In conclusion
, all the three diet practices are helpful in maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
life style.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
choice of option
clearly
depends up on personal choice and interest.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS academic The pie charts compare the percentage of carbohydrates, protein and fat with three different diet programs. v. 1

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
174 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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