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The Line Graph Gives Information About Land Used For Organic Crops In Two Countries From 1985 To 2010. v.2

The Line Graph Gives Information About Land Used For Organic Crops In Two Countries From 1985 To 2010. v. 2
The land used for organic crops in two nations has been depicted by given line graph from 1985 to 2010. One glance at the graph is enough to make it clear that maximum land for organic food had been used by Country A in middle years rather than Country B. It is clear that in 1985, approximately 25 hectare land was used by both nations. Whereas from 1985 to 1990, there was an increase in the usage of land, which was 60 hectare by Country A and 30 hectare by Country B and in 1995, the land used for organic food was witnessed at approximately 160 hectare by Countrie B and below 150 hectare by Country B. Moving further, in 2000, the land used by Country A had peak value at 280 hectare but after that the usage of land started declining and from 2005 to 2010 there was a rapid decline and reached at 150 hectare. In Country B, land usage was going down after 2000 year and in 2010 it was witnessed at 150 hectare, which was similar to country A.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for organic crops in two nations has
been depicted
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph from 1985 to 2010.

One glance at the graph is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that maximum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
for organic food had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
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Country
A in middle years
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
B.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that in 1985, approximately 25 hectare
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land
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by both nations. Whereas from 1985 to 1990, there was an increase in the usage of
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land
, which was 60
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
by
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Country
A and 30
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
by
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Country
B and in 1995, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for organic food
was witnessed
at approximately 160
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
Countrie
B and below 150
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
B.

Moving
further
, in 2000, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
A had peak value at 280
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
after that the usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
declining and from 2005 to 2010 there was a rapid decline and reached at 150
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
B,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
usage was going down after 2000 year and in 2010 it
was witnessed
at 150
Possible agreement error. The noun 'hectare' seems to be countable, so consider using: "hectares".
hectare
, which was similar to
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country
A.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS academic The Line Graph Gives Information About Land Used For Organic Crops In Two Countries From 1985 To 2010. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
183 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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