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The graphs below provide information on global population figures and figures for urban populations in different world regions. v.4

The graphs below provide information on global population figures and figures for urban populations in different world regions. v. 4
The line chart shows the change in the population in the world from 1800 to 2100 and the bar chart depicts the urban population in developing regions and developed regions from 2015 to 2040. Overall, the world population and the number of people living in cities in developing regions is predicted to increase, while the population residing in cities in developed regions is projected to remain unchanged throughout the period shown. Looking at the first chart, in 1800, the world population was 1000m of people, this figure then rose gradually to 3000m of people in 1960. In the following years, a sharp predicted growth can be seen in the number of people in the world, peaking 8000m of people in 2040 before a slight drop to 6000m of people in 2100. Turning to the bar chart, in 2015, just over 2000m of people living in cities in developing regions, close to 1500m of people residing in urban areas in developed regions. However, by 2040, experts predicted that the urban population in developing regions will rise gradually to 4000m, while those in developed regions will level off over the period of 25 years.
The line
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chart
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shows
the
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change
in the
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population
in the
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world
from 1800 to 2100 and the bar
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chart
depicts the urban
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population
in
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developing
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regions
and
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developed
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regions
from 2015 to 2040.
Overall
, the
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world
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population
and the number of
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people
living in cities in
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developing
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regions
is predicted
to increase, while the
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population
residing in cities in
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developed
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regions
is projected
to remain unchanged throughout the period shown.

Looking at the
first
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chart
, in 1800, the
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world
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population
was
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "1000 m"
1000m
of
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people
, this figure then rose
gradually
to
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "3000 m"
3000m
of
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people
in 1960. In the following years, a sharp predicted growth can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the number of
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people
in the
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world
, peaking
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8000m
of
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people
in 2040
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
a slight drop to
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "6000 m"
6000m
of
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people
in 2100.

Turning to the bar
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chart
, in 2015,
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just
over
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "2000 m"
2000m
of
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people
living in cities in
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developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
, close to
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "1500 m"
1500m
of
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people
residing in urban areas in
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developed
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regions
.
However
, by 2040, experts predicted that the urban
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population
in
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developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
will rise
gradually
to
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "4000 m"
4000m
, while those in
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developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
will level off over the period of 25 years.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
38Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS academic The graphs below provide information on global population figures and figures for urban populations in different world regions. v. 4

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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