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the graph shows anual no of rides taken on two forms of public trasportation in the city of williamsville v.2

the graph shows anual no of rides taken on two forms of public trasportation in the city of williamsville v. 2
The bar chart provides information on the total number of rides taken by bus and by subway in Williamsville during each year from 2011 to 2015. Overall, the annual ridership by subway showed an increasing trend over the time period, while by bus it was fluctuating. In 2011, annual bus ridership was a little over 400, 000, 000 and then it slightly rose to 450, 000, 000 in 2012. However, in 2013 it dropped a little but later increased to 500, 000, 000 after which it again reduced to 450, 000, 000. Annual subway ridership, on the other hand, rose steadily over the given period, starting from just above 600, 000, 000, which rose gradually to reach a peak of almost 750, 000, 000.
The bar chart provides information on the total number of rides taken by bus and by subway in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Williamsville
during each year from 2011 to 2015.

Overall
, the annual ridership by subway
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
an increasing trend over the time period, while by bus it was fluctuating.

In 2011, annual bus ridership was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
over 400, 000, 000 and then it
slightly
rose to 450, 000, 000 in 2012.
However
, in 2013 it dropped a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
later increased to 500, 000, 000 after which it again
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to 450, 000, 000.

Annual subway ridership,
on the other hand
, rose
steadily
over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period, starting from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above 600, 000, 000, which rose
gradually
to reach a peak of almost 750, 000, 000.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS academic the graph shows anual no of rides taken on two forms of public trasportation in the city of williamsville v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
124 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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