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The graph below shows the number of complaints made about noise to Environmental Health authorities in the city of Newtown between 1980 and 1996. v.4

The graph below shows the number of complaints made about noise to Environmental Health authorities in the city of Newtown between 1980 and 1996. v. 4
The line graph depicts the number of complaints received at Environmental authorities in NewTown from 1980 to 1996. Overall, all the number of complaints related to noise increased substantially, except for the road work related complaints despite which complaints were dominant at the beginning of the projected period. Initially, environmental authorities received complaints that are mainly related to road works of over 600 complaints in 1980, whereas other complaints were recorded at about 500 to 400 complaints for domestic and factory noises, relatively. The lowest number of complaints made were related to the traffic noises of 300 complaints. After 1980, the domestic noise complaints grew significantly with a periodic stablisation for the first 8 years, which number grew more than doubled to end at over 1, 200 complaints by 1996. This trend was similar for the traffic complaints as which number of complaints experienced a periodic stablisation for the first 8 years at around 300 before it peaked to 600 complaints. Meanwhile, the factory complaints showed a parabola line to reach at its peak in 1988 of close to 800 complaints before declining to 700 complaints by 1996.
The line graph depicts the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
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complaints
received at Environmental authorities in
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NewTown
from 1980 to 1996.
Overall
, all the
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number
of
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complaints
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related
to
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noise
increased
substantially
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
the road work
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related
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complaints
despite which
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complaints
were dominant at the beginning of the projected period.

Initially
, environmental authorities received
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complaints
that are
mainly
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related
to road works of over 600
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complaints
in 1980, whereas other
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complaints
were recorded
at about 500 to 400
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complaints
for domestic and factory
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noises
,
relatively
. The lowest
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number
of
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complaints
made were
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related
to the traffic
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noises
of 300 complaints.

After 1980, the domestic
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noise
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complaints
grew
significantly
with a periodic
Possible spelling mistake found.
stablisation
for the
first
8 years, which
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number
grew more than doubled to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
at over 1, 200
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complaints
by 1996. This trend was similar for the traffic
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complaints
as which
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
complaints
experienced a periodic
Possible spelling mistake found.
stablisation
for the
first
8 years at around 300
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it peaked to 600
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
complaints
. Meanwhile, the factory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
complaints
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a parabola line to reach at its peak in 1988 of close to 800
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
complaints
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
declining to 700
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
complaints
by 1996.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS academic The graph below shows the number of complaints made about noise to Environmental Health authorities in the city of Newtown between 1980 and 1996. v. 4

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
188 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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