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The first chart below shows then umber of airline crew(pilots, stewards etc) needed to fly a passenger plane between Australia and a number of other countries. The second chart shows the number of passenger complaints per plane journey made on these route v.2

The first chart below shows then umber of airline crew(pilots, stewards etc) needed to fly a passenger plane between Australia and a number of other countries. The second chart shows the number of passenger complaints per plane journey made on these route v. 2
The given charts evince some information about the airline crew number from Australia to some miscellaneous countries, the amount of dissatisfied passenger per plan, and the medium weight baggage, which is carrying by them. Turning to the number of crew on each plane, destination of Germany has the highest number (15), then the second highest belongs to Indonesia (11). This number for Malaysia destination is 8, and stands in New Zealand at 6, which less than halves of the maximum. Regarding to the complaining passenger numbers, we can see a reverse trend as to the crew number. It is the minimum in Germany (about 1), followed by Indonesia and Malaysia with approximately 3. For destination of New Zealand, this is extreme with more than 5 dissatisfied persons. With respect to mean burden of luggage, it has downright similar pattern to crew number. The passengers of destination of Germany has the weightiest luggage with about 37 Kg, and Indonesia is the second heaviest (just above 30 kg). it is 30 kg for Malaysia, and then stands 15 Kg for New Zealand, which is less than 50% of Germany. To recapitulate briefly, it seems there is a positive relationship between the number of crew and the average weight of baggage. Notwithstanding, a negative reflection can be seen between the crew number and the complaining passengers.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
charts evince
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
information about the airline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crew
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
from Australia to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
miscellaneous countries, the amount of dissatisfied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passenger
per plan, and the medium weight baggage, which is carrying by them.

Turning to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crew
on each
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
,
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destination
of Germany has the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
(15), then the second highest belongs to Indonesia (11). This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
for Malaysia
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destination
is 8, and stands in New Zealand at 6, which less than halves of the maximum.

The phrase 'Regarding to' is not correct. Use "Regarding" or "regard to".
Regarding to
the complaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passenger
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numbers
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a reverse trend as to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crew
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
. It is the minimum in Germany (about 1), followed by Indonesia and Malaysia with approximately 3. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destination
of New Zealand, this is extreme with more than 5 dissatisfied persons.

With respect to mean burden of luggage, it has downright similar pattern to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crew
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destination
of Germany has the weightiest luggage with about 37 Kg, and Indonesia is the second heaviest (
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above 30 kg).
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is 30 kg for Malaysia, and then stands 15 Kg for New Zealand, which is less than 50% of Germany.

To recapitulate
briefly
, it seems there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
relationship between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crew
and the average weight of baggage. Notwithstanding, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
reflection can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crew
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
and the complaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
.
0Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS academic The first chart below shows then umber of airline crew(pilots, stewards etc) needed to fly a passenger plane between Australia and a number of other countries. The second chart shows the number of passenger complaints per plane journey made on these route v. 2

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
223 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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