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The graph below shows the comparison between the number of applicants and the number of students who were granted admission. v.3

The graph below shows the comparison between the number of applicants and the number of students who were granted admission. v. 3
The column graph illustrates about the number of application and the number of successful candidates. Every year we can find that the applicant numbers are higher than the seats. In 1993 we can see a few candidates applied and a well number of applicants also selected. On the other hand, In 1994, 1995 we find a great differences between the applicants and the successful students. In 1993 almost 200 applicants applied and near about 150 students successfully admitted but In 1994 and 1995 respectively 600 and just over 1000 students applied and only a few number of students could confirm their seats which was respectively 300 and 350. Besides, on 1996 to 1999 there is a very dramatically differences between the applicants and successful candidates. In 1996 to 1999 probably just over 500 candidates could successful for getting admission but it is a matter of fact, among those years the rate of unsuccessful candidates increased dramatically and those were respectively in 1996 just under 2000, in 1997 the rate was 2300, in 1998 it was exactly 2500 and in 1999 it approx just over 2500. Moreover, on the year among 2000 to 2003 we can find out the same case that happened few last years. The applicants rates becoming higher and higher, nut the successful applicants were only a few. On 2000 approximately 3200, in 2001 the rate of applicants not so change which was 3300, in 2002 it was just over 4000 and in 2003 the number of applicants were just under 4500. In addition, only 600 candidates successed among those years. To sum up, overall, we can find that the rate of applicants was growing higher than the applicants who could successfully get admissions.
The column graph illustrates about the
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number
of application and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
. Every
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year
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
numbers
are higher than the seats.

In
The comma is probably missing here: "1993, we".
1993 we
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a few
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candidates
applied and a well
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
also
selected.
On the other hand
, In 1994, 1995 we
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find
a great differences between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. In 1993 almost 200
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applicants
applied and near about 150
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
successfully
admitted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
In 1994 and 1995
respectively
600 and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
1000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
applied and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
could confirm their seats which was
respectively
300 and 350.
Besides
, on 1996 to 1999 there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
dramatically
differences between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
and
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successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
. In 1996 to 1999
probably
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
500
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
for getting admission
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is a matter of fact, among those years the
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rate
of unsuccessful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
increased
dramatically
and those were
respectively
in 1996
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 2000, in 1997 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
was 2300, in 1998 it was exactly 2500 and in 1999 it approx
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
2500.
Moreover
, on the
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year
among 2000 to 2003 we can
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find
out the same case that happened few last years. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
You should probably use "rate".
rates
becoming higher and higher, nut the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few. On 2000 approximately 3200, in 2001 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
which was 3300, in 2002 it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
4000 and in 2003 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 4500.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
600
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
Possible spelling mistake found.
successed
among those years.

To sum up,
overall
, we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
was growing higher than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applicants
who could
successfully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admissions.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS academic The graph below shows the comparison between the number of applicants and the number of students who were granted admission. v. 3

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
286 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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