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The graph below shows information about the activities that New Zealand and Austalian children ẹnjoy doing the most in 2007. v.2

The graph below shows information about the activities that New Zealand and Austalian children ẹnjoy doing the most in 2007. v. 2
The line graph provides information about the proportion of tourists who visited aquariums, castles, zoos, and festivals in Edinburgh, Scotland from 1980 to 2010. It is clear that the trend of tourists to castles and zoos increased slightly over the period, while the other two places are aquarium and the festival had a lower percentage of visitors. In 1980, the number of tourists to castles initiated nearly 25%, while the percentage of tourists to the zoo was 10%. From 1980 to 200, the proportion of visitors to the castle rose dramatically to reach a peak of approximately 45% in 1995 and declined slightly to about 35% in 2000. After 2000, the percentage of tourists to Castle continued to go down gradually, the tourists to the zoo grew to 20% at the end of the period. The percentage of visitors to the festival was 30%, the highest percentage in 1980, while the proportion of visitors to the aquarium was almost 20% in the same year. There was an impressive increase in the proportion of tourists to the aquarium in 1985, at around 35%. Both the trends of the proportion of tourists to aquarium and festival decreased constantly after 1985.
The line graph provides information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
who visited aquariums, castles, zoos, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
in Edinburgh, Scotland from 1980 to 2010.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the trend of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to castles and zoos increased
slightly
over the period, while the other two places are aquarium and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
had a lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of visitors.

In 1980, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to castles initiated
nearly
25%, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to the zoo was 10%. From 1980 to 200, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of visitors to the castle rose
dramatically
to reach a peak of approximately 45% in 1995 and declined
slightly
to about 35% in 2000. After 2000, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to Castle continued to go down
gradually
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to the zoo grew to 20% at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of visitors to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
was 30%, the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
in 1980, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of visitors to the aquarium was almost 20% in the same year. There was an impressive increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to the aquarium in 1985, at around 35%. Both the trends of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to aquarium and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
decreased
constantly
after 1985.
0Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS academic The graph below shows information about the activities that New Zealand and Austalian children ẹnjoy doing the most in 2007. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
198 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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