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The graph and table below show the changes in the number of overseas visitors and top 5 visitor countries to Britain in 2004 and 2005. v.2

The graph and table below show the changes in the number of overseas visitors and top 5 visitor countries to Britain in 2004 and 2005. v. 2
The bar chart illustrates the changes figure of the tourists coming to the UK in 2014 and 2015, while the table provides information about the top five visitor nations of the Great Britain’s tourism. Overall, it is evident that the number of tourists visiting the UK in the meantime experienced a fluctuation. Japan, Australia and The United States were among the top three of the origin of the UK’s visitor. In january 2004, around 600. 000 of tourists travelled to Britain and the number decreased by 200. 000 in March. Following this, the figure increased to more than 700. 000 in June, reaching a peak at approximately 800. 000 in December. Britain’s tourist number from january to march 2005 was slightly different. While the former accounted for just below 600. 000, the latter was about 50. 000 lower. In June, the figure increased moderately, levelled off in September, before it jumped to about 800. 000 in December. The top three of the visitor origin countries to the UK in 2004 were Japan, Australia and America and it changed by japan dropped to second-place with the change number -3%, while both australia and america ware +2% each. Also, a new country entering the top five list was India with an additional number of visitor 17%.
The bar chart illustrates the
changes
figure of the
tourists
coming to the UK in 2014 and 2015, while the table provides information about the
top
five visitor nations of the Great Britain’s tourism.

Overall
, it is evident that the
number
of
tourists
visiting the UK in the meantime experienced a fluctuation. Japan, Australia and The United States were among the
top
three of the origin of the UK’s visitor.

In
january
2004, around 600. 000 of
tourists
travelled to Britain and the
number
decreased by 200. 000 in March. Following this, the figure increased to more than 700. 000 in June, reaching a peak at approximately 800. 000 in December. Britain’s
tourist
number
from
january
to
march
2005 was
slightly
different
. While the former accounted for
just
below 600. 000, the latter was about 50. 000 lower. In June, the figure increased
moderately
, levelled off in September,
before
it jumped to about 800. 000 in December.

The
top
three of the visitor origin countries to the UK in 2004 were Japan, Australia and America and it
changed
by japan dropped to second-place with the
change
number
-3%, while both
australia
and
america
ware +2% each.
Also
, a new country entering the
top
five list was India with an additional
number
of visitor 17%.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS academic The graph and table below show the changes in the number of overseas visitors and top 5 visitor countries to Britain in 2004 and 2005. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
214 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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