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The given line chart illustrates the number of people changed between birth and death in Scotland over period 80 years between 1940 and 2020 v.2

The given line chart illustrates the number of people changed between birth and death in Scotland over period 80 years between 1940 and 2020 v. 2
The line graph represents the proportion of birth, population and death trends in Scotland from 1940 to 2010 and the prediction for until 2020. Overall, all the rates in Scotland plummeted and the population growth rate stopped since 2005, whereas the death rate remained unchanged for more than 50 years. It is notable that, all these trends are expected to continue until 2020. There was a dramatic plunge in the proportion of birth rates in Scotland from 2. 5% to 1. 0% between 1940 and 2000, followed by death rates which decreased from 1940 (of 1. 5%) until 1960 (of 0. 5) and after that this was flat (0. 5%) until 2000. In contrast, the population growth rate increased from 1. 0% in 1940 to 1. 5% in 1950, before it started to decline to reach at close to 0% in 2000 and there were no records for population growth rates in Scotland. After 2000, when growth rate is excluded, Scotland shows a similar pattern but with a slower declining rate from around the end of 2020. Birth rates are expected to be below 1. 0% whereas the death rates are expected to increase to reach at 1. 0% by 2020.
The line graph represents the proportion of birth,
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population
and death trends in Scotland from 1940 to 2010 and the prediction for until 2020.
Overall
, all the
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rates
in Scotland plummeted and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
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rate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
since 2005, whereas the death
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rate
remained unchanged for more than 50 years. It is notable that, all these trends are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to continue until 2020.

There was a dramatic plunge in the proportion of birth
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rates
in Scotland from 2. 5% to 1. 0% between 1940 and 2000, followed by death
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rates
which decreased from 1940 (of 1. 5%) until 1960 (of 0. 5) and after that this was flat (0. 5%) until 2000.
In contrast
, the
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population
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growth
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rate
increased from 1. 0% in 1940 to 1. 5% in 1950,
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before
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to decline to reach at close to 0% in 2000 and there were no records for
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population
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growth
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rates
in Scotland.

After 2000, when
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growth
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rate
is excluded
, Scotland
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a similar pattern
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but
with a slower declining
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rate
from around the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of 2020. Birth
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rates
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to be below 1. 0% whereas the death
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rates
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to increase to reach at 1. 0% by 2020.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS academic The given line chart illustrates the number of people changed between birth and death in Scotland over period 80 years between 1940 and 2020 v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
201 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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