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The following diagram shows how greenhouse gases trap energy from the Sun. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown in the diagram. v.2

The following diagram shows how greenhouse gases trap energy from the Sun. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown in the diagram. v. 2
The given diagram explains how sun emitted energy gets trapped in our atmosphere due to the greenhouse effect. It is evident that logging of trees and fossil fuel driven vehicles worsen the greenhouse effect. Getting back to the details, sunlight that reaches the earth surface creates heats and a large portion of this heat was supposed to radiate back to Space without any hindrance. However, this is not the case and a great proportion of heat energy remains on earth due to different greenhouse gases. Though some sunlight is reflected off our atmosphere for the presence of the white cloud in the sky, a large portion of the heat created by sunlight rays do not leave the surface. Tree logging is a reason for enhanced greenhouse effect as less tree means less absorption of CO2, which is the main gas of greenhouse problem. Another aspect that enhances the average surface temperature by contributing to greenhouse phenomenon is the fossil fuel. This fuel is used to run different water and Highland vehicles and is responsible for the increasing emission of carbon dioxide gas. It is evident that to reduce the average temperature which is basically generated by the greenhouse effect, we need more trees and less use of fossil fuels to drive our cars and ships.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
how sun emitted energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
trapped in our atmosphere due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
effect. It is evident that logging of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
and fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
driven vehicles worsen the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
effect.

Getting back to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, sunlight that reaches the earth surface creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heats
and a large portion of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heat
was supposed
to radiate back to Space without any hindrance.
However
, this is not the case and a great proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heat
energy remains on earth due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
gases. Though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sunlight
is reflected
off our atmosphere for the presence of the white cloud in the sky, a large portion of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heat
created by sunlight rays do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the surface.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tree
logging is a reason for enhanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
effect as less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tree
means less absorption of CO2, which is the main gas of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
problem. Another aspect that enhances the average surface temperature by contributing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
phenomenon is the fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to run
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
water and Highland vehicles and is responsible for the increasing emission of carbon dioxide gas. It is evident that to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the average temperature which is
basically
generated by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
effect, we need more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
and less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
to drive our cars and ships.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS academic The following diagram shows how greenhouse gases trap energy from the Sun. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown in the diagram. v. 2

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
215 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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