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The figure shows the results of a survey of 1000 adolescents in five different countries. The participants were asked at what age they believed certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people. v.3

The figure shows the results of a survey of 1000 adolescents in five different countries. The participants were asked at what age they believed certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people. v. 3
The bar graph depicts the survey turnout of 1000 adolescents in 5 countries (USA, UK, Mexico, Japan, and Egypt). The study tackles the beliefs of the respondents as to what age should one be acceptable to have the rights and responsibilities for marriage, voting and criminal responsibility. In an overview, respondents replied that marriage should be applied for those over 20 in UK and Japan. Voting was tabulated to side with the same age proportion in Japan, while criminal responsibility was opined to be taken from the age of 18. Marriage was seen to be applicable greater in Japan and in the UK who are above the age of 20. Americans view it acceptable starting from the age of 18. Both Mexicans and Egyptians think 16 is the right marrying age. Furthermore, the power to vote at the age of 20 was seen mandatory in Japan; however, USA and Egypt reserved that right for citizens at the age of 17. The Britons, as well as Mexicans, wanted it to be applied a year younger. Lastly, criminal culpability age limit should begin at 18 years old in Japan, whereas the UK and the Mexican respondents believe it must be imposed at the age of 15 and a year before in Egypt. It was the USA subjects who saw it necessary to lower the threshold to 12 years old.
The bar graph depicts the survey turnout of 1000 adolescents in 5 countries (USA, UK, Mexico,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, and Egypt). The study tackles the beliefs of the respondents as to what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
should one be acceptable to have the rights and responsibilities for marriage, voting and criminal responsibility. In an overview, respondents replied that marriage should
be applied
for those over 20 in UK and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
. Voting
was tabulated
to side with the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
proportion in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, while criminal responsibility
was opined
to
be taken
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 18.

Marriage was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
to be applicable greater in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
and in the UK who are above the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 20. Americans view it acceptable starting from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 18. Both Mexicans and Egyptians
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
16 is the right marrying age.

Furthermore
, the power to vote at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 20 was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
mandatory in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
;
however
, USA and Egypt reserved that right for citizens at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 17. The Britons,
as well
as Mexicans, wanted it to
be applied
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
younger.

Lastly
, criminal culpability
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
limit should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
at 18 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, whereas the UK and the Mexican respondents believe it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be imposed
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 15 and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
in Egypt. It was the USA subjects who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
it necessary to lower the threshold to 12 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS academic The figure shows the results of a survey of 1000 adolescents in five different countries. The participants were asked at what age they believed certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people. v. 3

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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