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The diagrams below show the life cycle of the silkworm and the stages in the production of silk cloth. v.3

The diagrams below show the life cycle of the silkworm and the stages in the production of silk cloth. v. 3
The diagrams illustrate the life cycle process of the silkworm as well as various steps in making of silk cloth. Overall, the life cycle of silkworm has four major stages which begin with eggs and end with cocoon. Similarly, there are four main steps in the production of silk cloth commencing with boiling into the water and ending with dying process. Initially, the life cycle of silkworms starts with eggs which are laid by bees on the mulberry leaves. After this stage of the cycle, it becomes silkworm larva on mulberry leaves. It is then developed into silk thread within 4 to 6 weeks. After the last main stage of the life cycle, it is transformed into cocoons, which is necessary to make a silk cloth. In the production of silk cloths, selected cocoons are boiled into the water. Unwinding is in the second process in which 300 to 900 mm threads are produced. Eventually, it is then twisted which is helpful for making waves. Finally, the wave is ready for dye process in any colour for the final production of silk clothes.
The diagrams illustrate the
life
cycle
process of the silkworm
as well
as various steps in making of
silk
cloth.

Overall
, the
life
cycle
of silkworm has four major stages which
begin
with eggs and
end
with cocoon.
Similarly
, there are four main steps in the production of
silk
cloth commencing with boiling into the water and ending with dying process.

Initially
, the
life
cycle
of silkworms
starts
with eggs which
are laid
by bees on the mulberry
leaves
. After this stage of the
cycle
, it becomes silkworm larva on mulberry
leaves
. It is then developed into
silk
thread within 4 to 6 weeks. After the last main stage of the
life
cycle
, it
is transformed
into cocoons, which is necessary to
make
a
silk
cloth.

In the production of
silk
cloths, selected cocoons
are boiled
into the water. Unwinding is in the second process in which 300 to 900 mm threads
are produced
.
Eventually
, it is then twisted which is helpful for making waves.
Finally
, the wave is ready for dye process in any
colour
for the final production of
silk
clothes.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS academic The diagrams below show the life cycle of the silkworm and the stages in the production of silk cloth. v. 3

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
183 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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