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The diagram shows the process by which milk and related products are produced Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features Write at least 150 words v.2

The diagram shows the process by which milk and related products are produced
The flowchart illustrates the process of milk production, from the stage of cows grazing to the stage of delivering to customers. The first step of the process involves cows which are sent to grass fields. After the stage of grazing, cows will produce milk twice a day thanks to the use of a special milking machine. Raw milk from cows is then stored in refrigeration facilities to ensure that its best quality is maintained. A milk tanker is then used to deliver stored milk to Dairy on a daily basis. The Dairy is where industrial and manufacturing techniques are required to create finished milk. After this step, finished milk will be delivered in two ways. It can be processed one more time to produce cheese, cream and butter. Otherwise, processed milk from the Dairy will be automatically pasteurised and packaged in an assembly line. This stage is followed by the delivery of packaged milk to supermarkets and shops where customers normally purchase their milk.
The flowchart illustrates the process of
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milk
production, from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
of
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cows
grazing to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
of delivering to customers.

The
first
step of the process involves
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cows
which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to grass fields. After the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
of grazing,
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cows
will produce
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milk
twice a day thanks to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of a special milking machine.

Raw
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milk
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cows
is then stored in refrigeration facilities to ensure that its best quality
is maintained
. A
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milk
tanker is then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to deliver stored
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milk
to Dairy on a daily basis.

The Dairy is where industrial and manufacturing techniques
are required
to create finished
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milk
. After this step, finished
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milk
will
be delivered
in two ways. It can
be processed
one more time to produce cheese, cream and butter.

Otherwise
, processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
milk
from the Dairy will be
automatically
Possible spelling mistake. 'pasteurised' is British English.
pasteurised
and packaged in an assembly line. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
is followed
by the delivery of packaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
milk
to supermarkets and shops where customers
normally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
milk
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS academic The diagram shows the process by which milk and related products are produced

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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