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The diagram below shows the life cycle of a salmon, from egg to adult fish. v.1

The diagram below shows the life cycle of a salmon, from egg to adult fish. v. 1
The diagrammatic description is about different stages of a salmon fish's life. Overall, there are six stages in the lifecycle of salmon - starting from eggs to adult fish. To start with, after mating, female fish lays eggs. These eggs are laid in multiple and are kept further for an incubation period. Once the incubation time is over, they undergo emergence with the formation of body and head of the fish. Later they are transformed into infant salmon, and for further rearing, these proceed to an estuary. However, from the bay, they enter into the ocean to grow and mature. The next two cycles occur in the ocean. They take food and keep on growing further till these small fishes attain the proper size of salmon. As soon as they reach their adolescence and maturity, they start the journey back to river water for spawning. Then they swim all the way from the ocean to river to regenerate. Once again in the river, these salmons start reproducing, and the life cycle continues in the same way.
The diagrammatic description is about
different
stages of a salmon fish's life.
Overall
, there are six stages in the lifecycle of salmon
-
starting from eggs to adult fish.

To
start
with, after mating, female fish lays eggs. These eggs
are laid
in multiple and are
kept
further
for an incubation period. Once the incubation time is over, they undergo emergence with the formation of body and head of the fish. Later they
are transformed
into infant salmon, and for
further
rearing, these proceed to an estuary.
However
, from the bay, they enter into the ocean to grow and mature.

The
next
two cycles occur in the ocean. They take food and
keep
on growing
further
till these
small
fishes attain the proper size of salmon. As
soon
as they reach their adolescence and maturity, they
start
the journey back to river water for spawning. Then they swim all the way from the ocean to river to regenerate. Once again in the river, these salmons
start
reproducing, and the life cycle continues
in the same way
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows the life cycle of a salmon, from egg to adult fish. v. 1

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
176 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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