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the diagram below shows the information about the amount of money spend on alocol and drugs. summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparison where relevant. v.2

the diagram below shows the information about the amount of money spend on alocol and drugs.
The given vertical graph depict the information of spending money on alcohol or drugs. The is calibrated in dollars. The most striking feature to be observed is that the, largest money was spent on on alcohol on every year compare to spending on drugs. It can be vividly seen that, from 1975 to 1977, spending money on alcohol followed a decreasing trend falling from 146 to 140. billons of dollars. Further, in 1980, a remarkable improvement could be seen and reached at 186 billions of dollars. Then, spending on alcohol decreased slightly. Turning to rest ofbio description, in case of drugs, between 1975 to 1980, the amount of spending money upsurged slowly from 35 to 102 billions of dollars. Again spending declined remarkably with 65 millions of dollars. As far as comparison is concerned, spending on alcohol in 1975 was four times more compare to spending on drugs.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
vertical graph depict the information of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alcohol
or drugs. The
is calibrated
in dollars.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
most striking feature to
be observed
is that
Did you forget something after 'the'?
the,
A determiner is probably missing here: "the largest".
largest
money

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
was
spent
Possible typo: you repeated a word
on on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alcohol
on every year compare to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on drugs.

It can be
vividly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, from 1975 to 1977,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alcohol
followed a decreasing trend falling from 146 to 140.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
billons
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
.
Further
, in 1980, a remarkable improvement could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
and reached at
Use a singular form of the numeral here: "186 billion".
186 billions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. Then,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alcohol
decreased
slightly
.

Turning to rest
Possible spelling mistake found.
ofbio
description, in case of drugs,
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1975 and 1980".
between 1975 to 1980
, the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
money upsurged
slowly
from 35 to
Use a singular form of the numeral here: "102 billion".
102 billions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. Again
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
declined
remarkably
with
Use a singular form of the numeral here: "65 million".
65 millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. As far as comparison
is concerned
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alcohol
in 1975 was four times more compare to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on drugs.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS academic the diagram below shows the information about the amount of money spend on alocol and drugs.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
148 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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