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The charts below show the result of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reason why adults decide to study. The pie chart shows how people think the costs of adult education should be shared. v.8

The charts below show the result of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reason why adults decide to study. The pie chart shows how people think the costs of adult education should be shared. v. 8
The given data shows why the grownup people continue their study and their opinion how the cost of this adult study should be shared. According to the first bar graph, around 40% adults decide to study because of their interest in studying which is the most influential reason for adults to study. Gaining qualification is another important reason that influences more than 35% adult to continue their studies. Job-related reasons contribute to around 20% adult to decide to study while meeting people inspire around 10% people to study. According to the pie chart, the people who have decided to do the further education think that 40% of this cost should be provided by the individuals who are getting enrolled in the study while 35% cost should be shared by the employer since they are deciding to study to do better in their job position. The remaining 25% cost should be shared by the taxpayers according to these people. In summary, interest in subjects, improving qualification, better job position and improving communication with people are the reasons most adults decide to study and according to them the cost of this study should be shared by individuals, employers and taxpayers.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
data
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
why the grownup
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
continue their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
and their opinion how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of this adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
should
be shared
.

According to the
first
bar graph, around 40%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
decide to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their interest in studying which is the most influential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
. Gaining qualification is another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
that influences more than 35% adult to continue their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. Job-related
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reasons
contribute to around 20% adult to decide to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
while meeting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
inspire around 10%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to study.

According to the pie chart, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have decided to do the
further
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that 40% of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
should
be provided
by the individuals who are getting enrolled in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
while 35%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
should
be shared
by the employer since they are deciding to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
to do better in their job position. The remaining 25%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
should
be shared
by the taxpayers according to these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In summary, interest in subjects, improving qualification, better job position and improving communication with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
decide to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
and according to them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
should
be shared
by individuals, employers and taxpayers.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS academic The charts below show the result of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reason why adults decide to study. The pie chart shows how people think the costs of adult education should be shared. v. 8

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
198 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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