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The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23 65 in di erent occupations in one UK town Ashby and in the UK as a whole in 2008 v.2

The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23 65 in di erent occupations in one UK town Ashby and in the UK as a whole in 2008 v. 2
The pie chart compares the proportion of residents from 23 to 65 years old in the UK and part of it, namely Ashby, in the 2008 year. Looking at the graph, it is immediately obvious that the unemployed rate in Ashby more than the national rate. Moreover, while British people generally preferred office work, personal service was the most popular job in Ashby. As can be seen from three types of work: individual service, unemployment and office work, there wasn' t a big difference between them. Details, the percentage of the jobless citizen in Ashby was 14%, whereas that recorded in the whole nation was only 10%. Similarly, the number of people worked in individual service also higher 4% than that of nationwide with data as above. Meanwhile, only having a very small discrepancy in the other two occupations. The proportion of person who employed in office work and shop work were 18% and 14% respectively, similar to that of the entire of England, with at 19% and 13% sequentially. Regarding the remaining jobs, Ashby reported that 16% of people living here were construction workers, while the figure for the whole UK was 10%. By contrast, relating to professional work, 8% of Ashby residents did this type of business, compared to 14% of the population of the country. Lastly, the rest of the cake for the technical task, with 9% for Ashby and 17% for the UK, and this was also the largest difference in 7 kinds of profession.
The pie chart compares the proportion of residents from 23 to 65 years
old
in the UK and part of it,
namely
Ashby, in the 2008 year.

Looking at the graph, it is immediately obvious that the unemployed rate in Ashby more than the national rate.
Moreover
, while British
people
generally
preferred office
work
, personal service was the most popular job in Ashby.

As can be
seen
from three types of
work
: individual service, unemployment and office
work
, there
wasn&
#039; t a
big
difference between them.
Details
, the percentage of the jobless citizen in Ashby was 14%, whereas that recorded in the whole nation was
only
10%.
Similarly
, the number of
people
worked in individual service
also
higher 4% than that of nationwide with data as above. Meanwhile,
only
having a
very
small
discrepancy in the other two occupations. The proportion of person who employed in office
work
and shop
work
were 18% and 14%
respectively
, similar to that of the entire of England, with at 19% and 13%
sequentially
.

Regarding the remaining jobs, Ashby reported that 16% of
people
living here were construction workers, while the figure for the whole UK was 10%. By contrast, relating to professional
work
, 8% of Ashby residents did this type of business, compared to 14% of the population of the country.
Lastly
, the rest of the cake for the technical task, with 9% for Ashby and 17% for the UK, and this was
also
the largest difference in 7 kinds of profession.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
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Edward De Waal

IELTS academic The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23 65 in di erent occupations in one UK town Ashby and in the UK as a whole in 2008 v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
249 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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