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The charts below show agricultural production in two different regions of the country Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant v.2

The charts below show agricultural production in two different regions of the country
The diagram illustrates the proportion of agricultural products in two particular areas of the nation. Overall, it is clear to see that the percentage of vegetables and grain in the East is very different from those in Western Region. Besides, meat products occupies the same rate in both areas. The percentage of vegetables is at the highest place, about 20% in Eastern Region while in the West side, it is a very small number, only 5%. In contrast, grain in the East has the smallest percentage 45% of all agricultural products and they produce those three times the grain percentage in the West than in the East. The percentage of meat at both regions is exactly the same, 35% of all products. Meanwhile, the West has 15% of dairy products and the East has twice times the percentage of dairy products than the West,
The diagram illustrates the proportion of agricultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in two particular areas of the nation.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of vegetables and grain in the East is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from those in Western Region.
Besides
, meat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
occupies the same rate in both areas.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of vegetables is at the highest place, about 20% in Eastern Region while in the West side, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
number,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5%.
In contrast
, grain in the East has the smallest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
45% of all agricultural
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
products and
they produce those three times the grain
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percentage
in the West than in the East.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of meat at both regions is exactly the same, 35% of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. Meanwhile, the West has 15% of dairy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and the East has twice times the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of dairy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
than the West,
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand.
Marcus Fabius Quintilian

IELTS academic The charts below show agricultural production in two different regions of the country

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
144 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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