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The charts below give information on the ages of people when they got married in one particular country in 1996 and 2008. v.1

The charts below give information on the ages of people when they got married in one particular country in 1996 and 2008. v. 1
The given bar charts compare the variation of the percentage of men and women getting married in 1998 and 2008. In general, the proportion of married individuals of both genders experienced a slight decrease for those aged under 30 years old and a noticeable increase for the other age groups in the given decade, and the age from 25 to 29 years old was the most ideal age to get married. It is also obvious that the marriage age for men is usually higher than women’s. As presented in the chart, there was a minor decline in the percentage of women getting married under the age of 24, especially the percentage of early 20-year-old married females was half in 2008 compared to that in 1998. Noticeably, no males got married during the age of 16 to 19. The rate of 25-29-year-old women married to their husband remained unchanged at approximately 11, 5% over a 10–year period, while men’s figure observed a slight drop to 8% in 2008. With regard to older age groups, a substantial rise was witnessed in the proportion of 30-37 years old married people in both genders which accounted for 8% for females and 11% for males in 2008, in comparison with 7% and 9% respectively in 1998. For people aged above 35, the proportion of married men surged substantially to 9% and nearly 7%, resulting in twofold figures of women over 35 years old.
The
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given
bar charts compare the variation of the percentage of
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men
and
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women
getting married in 1998 and 2008.
In general
, the proportion of married individuals of both genders experienced a slight decrease for those aged under 30 years
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old
and a noticeable increase for the other
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age
groups in the
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given
decade, and the
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age
from 25 to 29 years
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old
was the most ideal
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age
to
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get
married. It is
also
obvious that the marriage
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age
for
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men
is
usually
higher than women’s.

As presented in the chart, there was a minor decline in the percentage of
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women
getting married under the
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age
of 24,
especially
the percentage of early 20-year-
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old
married females was half in 2008 compared to that in 1998.
Noticeably
, no males
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got
married during the
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age
of 16 to 19. The rate of 25-29-year-
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old
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women
married to their husband remained unchanged at approximately 11, 5% over a
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10–year
period, while
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men’s
figure observed a slight drop to 8% in 2008.

With regard to older
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age
groups, a substantial rise
was witnessed
in the proportion of 30-37 years
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old
married
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in both genders which accounted for 8% for females and 11% for males in 2008,
in comparison
with 7% and 9%
respectively
in 1998. For
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged above 35, the proportion of married
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men
surged
substantially
to 9% and
nearly
7%, resulting in twofold figures of
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women
over 35 years
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old
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
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IELTS academic The charts below give information on the ages of people when they got married in one particular country in 1996 and 2008. v. 1

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
238 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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