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The chart below show degrees granted in different fields at the National University in the years 1990 2000 and 2010 v.2

The chart below show degrees granted in different fields at the National University in the years 1990 2000 and 2010 v. 2
The given pie charts depict data on the changes in the number of degrees granted in 4 different fields of study (Law, Medicine, Business and Computer Science) at the National University in 1990, 2000 and 2010. Overall, it is clear that initially most degrees were granted in Computer Science and Business, whereas Law accounted for the lowest number of awarded degrees. Subsequently, Computer Science remained the most preferred field, as opposed to Business, which decreased in popularity. Law continuted showing the lowest figure in 2000 and 2010. According to the pie charts, in 1990 30% of the degrees were awarded in Computer Science, and following that the figure increased to 40% and 45% in 2000 and 2010 respectively. Conversely, the number of degrees awarded in Business showed a downward trend: the figure was at 30% in 1990, it decreased by 10% in 2000 and there was a 5% decline in 2010. With regard to the remaining fields of study, 25% of the degrees were granted to medical students in both 1990 and 2010, while in the same years 15% were awarded to Law students. In 2000 the figure for degrees granted in Medicine rose by 5% and the one for degrees awarded in Law dropped by 5%.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie charts depict data on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the number of
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degrees
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granted
in 4
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
fields of study
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(Law
, Medicine,
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Business
and Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science)
at the National University in 1990, 2000 and 2010.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
initially
most
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degrees
were
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granted
in Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
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Business
, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Law
accounted for the lowest number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awarded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
.
Subsequently
, Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
remained the most preferred field, as opposed to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
, which decreased in popularity.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Law
Possible spelling mistake found.
continuted
showing the lowest
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figure
in 2000 and 2010.

According to the pie charts, in 1990 30% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awarded
in Computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
, and following that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
increased to 40% and 45% in 2000 and 2010
respectively
.
Conversely
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awarded
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a downward trend: the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
was at 30% in 1990, it decreased by 10% in 2000 and there was a 5% decline in 2010.

With regard to the remaining fields of study, 25% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
granted
to medical students in both 1990 and 2010, while in the same years 15% were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awarded
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Law
students. In 2000 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
granted
in Medicine rose by 5% and the one for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degrees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awarded
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Law
dropped by 5%.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS academic The chart below show degrees granted in different fields at the National University in the years 1990 2000 and 2010 v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
207 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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