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The chart below gives information about social networking sites people used in Canada between 2014 and 2015. v.1

The chart below gives information about social networking sites people used in Canada between 2014 and 2015. v. 1
The following chart provides information on the numerous social networking sites people benefit from in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Overall, it has been noticed that people tend to use one site only thus having the highest percentage. However, only a few people use five sites and therefore it is shown that it has the lowest rate. To begin with, how the usage of one site is at the peak grasps the attention; in addition, the variations between the consumption of one site and the others are enormous. Moreover, in 2015 the utilization of one site remains the highest but it has decreased from slightly more than three-tenths to approximately higher than a quarter. On the other hand, the utilization of five sites has had the minimal percentages in 2014 and 2015. Furthermore, there is a drastic gap between the usage of five sites and the rest. Nonetheless, a small improvement has been spotted; the rates went from one percent higher than one-hundredth to one percent subtracted from one-twentieth.
The following chart provides information on the numerous social networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
benefit from in Canada in 2014 and 2015.

Overall
, it has
been noticed
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thus
having the highest percentage.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
five
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
and
therefore
it
is shown
that it has the lowest rate.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, how the usage of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
is at the peak grasps the attention;
in addition
, the variations between the consumption of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
and the others are enormous.
Moreover
, in 2015 the utilization of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
remains the highest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has decreased from
slightly
more than three-tenths to approximately higher than a quarter.

On the other hand
, the utilization of five
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
has had the minimal percentages in 2014 and 2015.
Furthermore
, there is a drastic gap between the usage of five
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
and the rest. Nonetheless, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
improvement has
been spotted
; the rates went from one percent higher than one-hundredth to one percent subtracted from one-twentieth.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS academic The chart below gives information about social networking sites people used in Canada between 2014 and 2015. v. 1

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
169 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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