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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give yo v.54

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. 54
Build a healthy society is one of the most controversial subjects in modern world. Although, some people think that rising the number of sports equipments could be beneficial for such issue, the other believe that there should be more practical suggestions. In my opinion, governments should be more realistic about it and come up with more workable alternatives. Most of the people do not have any vigorous activities which is because of their sedentary lifestyle. So, they just walk couple of minutes during the day. Obviously, if the sports facilities are installed at their workplace, as a result, they will be more active and energetic which lead to the healthier physiology. People' s diet has been changed a lot in recent years. To be precise, due to their hectic lifestyle, they would prefer to have a prepared meal in mid-day, contains junk food and unhealthy nutrition, which may be cause of serious diseases such as heart attack and obesity. To tackle this problem, media should define a solution to change eating habits to not only the healthier one, but also the one which leads to longevity. In conclusion, there is two different belief about public health solutions. The former one is based on increasing the number of sports equipments and the later one is based on more foundation resolution. In my point of view, due to the changing in eating habits, installing more facilities is not the best option and there should be more efficient alters such as changing peoples diet and manufactured more healthier nutrition.
Build a healthy society is one of the most controversial subjects in modern world. Although,
some
people
think
that rising the number of sports equipments could be beneficial for such issue, the other believe that there should be more practical suggestions. In my opinion,
governments
should be more realistic about it and
come
up with more
workable
alternatives.

Most of the
people
do not have any vigorous activities which is
because
of their sedentary lifestyle.
So
, they
just
walk
couple of
minutes during the day.
Obviously
, if the sports facilities
are installed
at their workplace,
as a result
, they will be more active and energetic which lead to the healthier physiology.

People&
#039; s diet has been
changed
a lot in recent years. To be precise, due to their hectic lifestyle, they would prefer to have a prepared meal in mid-day, contains junk food and unhealthy nutrition, which may
be cause
of serious diseases such as heart attack and obesity. To tackle this problem, media should define a solution to
change
eating habits to not
only
the healthier one,
but
also
the one which leads to longevity.

In conclusion
, there is two
different
belief about public health solutions. The former one
is based
on increasing the number of sports equipments and the later one
is based
on more foundation resolution. In my point of view, due to the changing in eating habits, installing more facilities is not the best option and there should be more efficient alters such as changing peoples diet and manufactured
more healthier
nutrition.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS academic Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. 54

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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