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Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishm v.27

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishm v. 27
The line graph compares the amount of fish, lamb, beef and chicken which was consumed weekly by each person in Europe over a period 25 years, starting from 1979. Overall, the consumption of chicken increased significantly while ones of the other types of meat has opposite trend. Looking at the detail, chicken was used the most popularly in a European country. This figure boosted from nearly 150 grams in 1979 to about 250 grams in 2004. The consumption of fish declined slightly during this period and fluctuated around 50 grams each person per week. The other kinds of meat life beef and lamb witnessed a dramatically decrease in the consumption. In 1979, beef was preferred the most by inhabitants in a European country with under 225 grams per person, but this figure reduced to over 100 grams in 2004. The amount of lamb also has down trend from 150 grams to more 50 grams one person per week.
The line graph compares the amount of fish, lamb, beef and chicken which
was consumed
weekly by each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
in Europe over a period 25 years, starting from 1979.

Overall
, the consumption of chicken increased
significantly
while ones of the other types of meat has opposite trend.

Looking at the detail, chicken was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the most
popularly
in a European country. This figure boosted from
nearly
150
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 1979 to about 250
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 2004. The consumption of fish declined
slightly
during this period and fluctuated around 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
per week.

The other kinds of meat life beef and lamb witnessed a
You used an adverb ('dramatically') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('decrease') instead of another adjective.
dramatically decrease
in the consumption. In 1979, beef
was preferred
the most by inhabitants in a European country with under 225
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to over 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 2004. The amount of lamb
also
has down
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "trended".
trend
from 150
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
to more 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
per week.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS academic Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishm v. 27

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
158 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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