The provided line graph illustrates the acid level in the mouth which is caused by the consumption of cane sugar, fruit sugar, and honey. As is shown in the graph, the higher the acid level, the lower the pH level. It is also illustrated that a pH level less than 5. 5 is the stage when tooth decay occurs.
It is significant that the initial pH level in our mouth is 7, and it drops the moment we eat sugar. In the first 5 minutes, the graph shows that eating cane sugar results in a major drop in the pH level which reaches 3. 5 and then begins to increase very slowly in half an hour. During this phase, tooth decay is most likely to happen. It is almost the same when eating fruit sugar, as the pH level drops to less than 4. 5 in 5 minutes, and remains at the detrimental level for about 20 minutes. Moreover, the pH level drops to less than 5 when honey is taken, and it possesses the threat of tooth decay for only 10 minutes. So, honey is the least dangerous among the three kinds of food items.
In summary, it appears that cane sugar is the most detrimental one for our dental health while honey is the safest one. 
The provided line graph illustrates the acid  
level
 in the mouth which  
is caused
 by the consumption of cane  
sugar
, fruit  
sugar
, and honey. As  
is shown
 in the graph, the higher the acid  
level
, the lower the pH  
level
. It is  
also
 illustrated that a pH  
level
 less than 5. 5 is the stage when tooth decay occurs.
It is significant that the initial pH  
level
 in our mouth is 7, and it drops the moment we eat  
sugar
. In the  
first
 5 minutes, the graph  
shows
 that eating cane  
sugar
 results in a major drop in the pH  
level
 which reaches 3. 5 and then  
begins
 to increase  
very
  slowly
 in half an hour. During this phase, tooth decay is most likely to happen. It is almost the same when eating fruit  
sugar
, as the pH  
level
 drops to less than 4. 5 in 5 minutes, and remains at the detrimental  
level
 for about 20 minutes.  
Moreover
, the pH  
level
 drops to less than 5 when honey  
is taken
, and it possesses the threat of tooth decay for  
only
 10 minutes.  
So
, honey is the least  
dangerous
 among the three kinds of food items.
In summary, it appears that cane  
sugar
 is the most detrimental one for our dental health while honey is the safest one. 
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes