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7. Tobacco, mainly in form of cigarettes, is one of the most-widely used drugs in the world. Over a billion adults legally smoke tobacco every day. The long term health costs are high - for smokers themselves, and for the wider community in terms of health v.2

7. Tobacco, mainly in form of cigarettes, is one of the most-widely used drugs in the world. Over a billion adults legally smoke tobacco every day. The long term health costs are high - for smokers themselves, and for the wider community in terms of health v. 2
Despite many harmful effects smoking is legal in many countries across the world. Over than billion of people smoke cigarettes in world which cause immense health issues like cancer, asthma, cough and many lungs and heart-related diseases. Most of the people start smoking in college due to pressure of peers which become addiction in long term. Other group of people say life is once and they want to enjoy their life at fullest and many blame destiny for whatever happening in their life. Due to aforementioned reasons i think Government should intervene to enforce such people to stop smoking. On other hand there are large number of smokers who are unaware of adverse of smoking and gave up smoking later on when they understand consequences of smoking. In many developed and developing countries, Government legislated and enforced people to stop smoking by increasing prices and levying higher taxes on the tobacco products. Further, Government legislated 21 year as age for smoking in many countries. Adults are best to understand good and bad about themselves but Government should run campaigns to make people aware about effects of smoking.
Despite
many
harmful effects
smoking
is legal in
many
countries across the world.
Over
than
billion
of
people
smoke cigarettes in world which cause immense health issues like cancer, asthma, cough and
many
lungs and heart-related diseases.

Most of the
people
start
smoking
in college due to pressure of peers which become addiction in long term. Other group of
people
say life is
once and
they want to enjoy their life at fullest and
many
blame destiny for whatever happening in their life. Due to aforementioned reasons
i
think
Government
should intervene to enforce such
people
to
stop
smoking
. On other hand there are large number of smokers who are unaware of adverse of
smoking
and gave up
smoking
later on when they understand consequences of smoking.

In
many
developed and
developing countries
,
Government
legislated and enforced
people
to
stop
smoking
by increasing prices and levying higher taxes on the tobacco products.
Further
,
Government
legislated 21 year as age for
smoking
in
many
countries. Adults are best to understand
good
and
bad
about themselves
but
Government
should run campaigns to
make
people
aware about effects of
smoking
.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
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IELTS academic 7. Tobacco, mainly in form of cigarettes, is one of the most-widely used drugs in the world. Over a billion adults legally smoke tobacco every day. The long term health costs are high - for smokers themselves, and for the wider community in terms of health v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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