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7. Tobacco, mainly in form of cigarettes, is one of the most-widely used drugs in the world. Over a billion adults legally smoke tobacco every day. The long term health costs are high - for smokers themselves, and for the wider community in terms of health v.2

7. Tobacco, mainly in form of cigarettes, is one of the most-widely used drugs in the world. Over a billion adults legally smoke tobacco every day. The long term health costs are high - for smokers themselves, and for the wider community in terms of health v. 2
Despite many harmful effects smoking is legal in many countries across the world. Over than billion of people smoke cigarettes in world which cause immense health issues like cancer, asthma, cough and many lungs and heart-related diseases. Most of the people start smoking in college due to pressure of peers which become addiction in long term. Other group of people say life is once and they want to enjoy their life at fullest and many blame destiny for whatever happening in their life. Due to aforementioned reasons i think Government should intervene to enforce such people to stop smoking. On other hand there are large number of smokers who are unaware of adverse of smoking and gave up smoking later on when they understand consequences of smoking. In many developed and developing countries, Government legislated and enforced people to stop smoking by increasing prices and levying higher taxes on the tobacco products. Further, Government legislated 21 year as age for smoking in many countries. Adults are best to understand good and bad about themselves but Government should run campaigns to make people aware about effects of smoking.
Despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
harmful effects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
is legal in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries across the world.
Use "(Over)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
Over
than
Use "a billion" or use a number before 'billion'.
billion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
smoke cigarettes in world which cause immense health issues like cancer, asthma, cough and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
lungs and heart-related diseases.

Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in college due to pressure of peers which become addiction in long term. Other group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say life is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
once and
they want to enjoy their life at fullest and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
blame destiny for whatever happening in their life. Due to aforementioned reasons
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should intervene to enforce such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
. On other hand there are large number of smokers who are unaware of adverse of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
and gave up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
later on when they understand consequences of smoking.

In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
developed and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
legislated and enforced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
by increasing prices and levying higher taxes on the tobacco products.
Further
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
legislated 21 year as age for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries. Adults are best to understand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
about themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should run campaigns to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aware about effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS academic 7. Tobacco, mainly in form of cigarettes, is one of the most-widely used drugs in the world. Over a billion adults legally smoke tobacco every day. The long term health costs are high - for smokers themselves, and for the wider community in terms of health v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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