Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Your family is going to move to another town. Write a letter to the Principal of a local school asking if they will accept your son. v.4

Your family is going to move to another town. Write a letter to the Principal of a local school asking if they will accept your son. v. 4
Respected Sir/Madam, I intend to write this letter to you to seek your support. We have been shifted to this town recently. Previously we were living at Cheetham Hill town in Manchester and moved to this area due to my husband’s job posting. My son is 12 years of age and he was in standard 7 when we moved. I request you to enroll my son to your school in 7th standard. I understand that is mid-year and admissions are closed, but it would be very kind of you to accommodate. Due to our unplanned and sudden shifting, my son will suffer and his one year will be wasted. I assure you that my son will adjust in class very quickly as he is not only very good in academics but also a school athlete. He used to be a school football captain and would like to continue playing in your school as well. I have heard of your school’s reputation and positive reviews of parents and it would be honor for me if you accommodate my son. I shall be very grateful to you for this. Looking forward to your positive response. Yours faithfully, Samantha
Respected Sir/Madam,

I intend to write this letter to you to seek your support. We have
been shifted
to this town recently. Previously we were living at
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cheetham
Hill town in Manchester and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to this area due to my husband’s job posting. My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
is 12 years of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
age and
he was in standard 7 when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
. I request you to enroll my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
to your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
in 7th standard. I understand
that is
mid-year and admissions
are closed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
kind of you to accommodate. Due to our unplanned and sudden shifting, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
will suffer and his one year will
be wasted
. I assure you that my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
will adjust in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
as he is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in academics
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
athlete. He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
football captain and would like to continue playing in your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as well
. I have heard of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school’s
reputation and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
reviews of parents and it would be honor for me if you accommodate my son.

I shall be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
grateful to you for this. Looking forward to your
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
response.

Yours
faithfully
,

Samantha
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS letter Your family is going to move to another town. Write a letter to the Principal of a local school asking if they will accept your son. v. 4

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
195 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Your family is going to move to another town. Write a letter to the Principal of a local school asking if they will accept your son. v.4