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You had a problem with the flight staff on a recent flight Write a letter to the airline to manage to complain Include the flight details Explain what happened Tell the manager what you want them to do v.2

You had a problem with the flight staff on a recent flight Write a letter to the airline to manage to complain Include the flight details Explain what happened Tell the manager what you want them to do v. 2
Dear, I am writing this letter to convey my disappointment because of the unprofessional behavior of your staff members while traveling to the USA for my business trip last week. I did ask one of your cabin crew to provide me with a glass of water as I have to take medicine per my Doctor’s advice on time, but he didn’t bother my request and usually treated business class passengers as his first preference. Although, I reminded him several times while passing through, and did explain to him medical condition but without any success. When I gave him a push for the said request, he started lashing out at me with a loud voice in front of others and was so rude to me for a simple request. I would like the manager to call on him, and educate him on how to respond to the passenger’s request despite his/her class in the flight because all the people have equal rights to be treated in the plane. In addition, the company must nominate his name for anger management, and customer care training in the upcoming performance appraisal. I hope you will pay attention to my complaint per your airline procedure in a bid to avoid any future events with other passengers.
Dear,

I am writing this letter to convey my disappointment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the unprofessional behavior of your staff members while traveling to the USA for my business trip
‘last week’ indicates a finished event of the past. Please check the predicate's tense.
last week
.

I did ask one of your cabin crew to provide me with a glass of water as I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take medicine per my Doctor’s advice on time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he didn’t bother my request and
usually
treated business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
passengers as his
first
preference. Although, I reminded him several times while passing through, and did
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
to him medical condition
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
without any success. When I gave him a push for the said request, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
lashing out at me with a loud voice in front of others and was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
rude to me for a simple request.

I would like the manager to call on him, and educate him on how to respond to the passenger’s request despite his/her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
in the flight
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have equal rights to
be treated
in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
.
In addition
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
nominate his name for anger management, and customer care training in the upcoming performance appraisal.

I hope you will pay attention to my complaint per your airline procedure in a bid to avoid any future
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
with other passengers.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Speak a new language so that the world will be a new world.
Rumi

IELTS letter You had a problem with the flight staff on a recent flight Write a letter to the airline to manage to complain Include the flight details Explain what happened Tell the manager what you want them to do v. 2

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
211 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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