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You and your family are living in a rented accommodation in an English speaking country. you are not satisfied with the condition of some of the furniture. Write a letter to the landlord. I your letter- introduce yourself- explain what is wrong with the fu v.2

You and your family are living in a rented accommodation in an English speaking country. you are not satisfied with the condition of some of the furniture. Write a letter to the landlord. I your letter- introduce yourself- explain what is wrong with the fu v. 2
Dear Mrs. Smith, I am writing to you to express my dissatisfaction regarding the egrereous condition of some furniture in the house my family ranted two days ago. My name is Jim. I am the oldest son of Mr and Mrs Pan who ranted your house from 8 to 10 February 2017. My family and I appreciate the location of your house, which is a few minutes walk from the beach. However, we discontent with the condition of the furniture inside. Some of the furniture are so badly maintained that dust covered its surface. My family and I had to sit on floor. Besides, the beds in your house are unsanitery. My parents and my little sister suffered from hives after sleeping on it. We all regret that we did not cancel our reservation on the first day when we entered your house. I would like wo request a full refund for our suffering in your house. If you need any proof, please feel free to contact me. I am looking forward to your reply. Yours faithfully, Kim Pan
Dear Mrs. Smith,

I am writing to you to express my dissatisfaction regarding the
Possible spelling mistake found.
egrereous
condition of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
furniture in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
my family ranted two days ago.

My name is Jim. I am the oldest son of Mr and Mrs Pan who ranted your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
from 8 to 10 February 2017. My family and I appreciate the location of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, which is a few minutes walk from the beach.
However
, we discontent with the condition of the furniture inside.

If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
furniture are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
badly
maintained that dust covered its surface. My family and I had to sit on floor.
Besides
, the beds in your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
unsanitery
. My parents and my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
sister suffered from hives after sleeping on it. We all regret that we did not cancel our reservation on the
first
day when we entered your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

I would like
Possible spelling mistake found.
wo
request a full refund for our suffering in your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
. If you need any proof,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
feel free to contact me.

I am looking forward to your reply.

Yours
faithfully
,

Kim Pan
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS letter You and your family are living in a rented accommodation in an English speaking country. you are not satisfied with the condition of some of the furniture. Write a letter to the landlord. I your letter- introduce yourself- explain what is wrong with the fu v. 2

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
178 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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