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One of your pen friends wants to improve their English at a language school. they have never studied at a language school before and have asked for your advice on how to choose a good one. write a letter to your pen friend. advise them about the following v.2

One of your pen friends wants to improve their English at a language school. they have never studied at a language school before and have asked for your advice on how to choose a good one. write a letter to your pen friend. advise them about the following v. 2
Dear John, Hope this letter finds you in good health. I am writing to explain my advice regarding your improvement in English at a language school. First of all, I was so pleased to hear about that you have planned to enroll for English course at a language education institution. However, you have to know about the teaching method such as it is better if they have electronic gadgets in the classroom which can be beneficial for all learners to learn real conversation between each other throughout the world. Also, the number of students should not exceed fifteen in a single class otherwise you may face communication problem with a tutor while studying in a classroom. To top it all off, according to my point of view, you have to spend at least 30 hours in a week to get better command in such international language. Hope it would be helpful while selecting a language school for an aforesaid purpose. If you need any more advice, just drop me a line. All the best, john
Dear John,

Hope this letter finds you in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health. I am writing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my advice regarding your improvement in English at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
school.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
to hear about that you have planned to enroll for English course at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
education institution.
However
, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
know about the teaching method such as it is better if they have electronic gadgets in the classroom which can be beneficial for all learners to learn real conversation between each other throughout the world.
Also
, the number of students should not exceed fifteen in a single
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
otherwise
you may face communication problem with a tutor while studying in a classroom.

To top it all off, according to my point of view, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend at least 30 hours in a week to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better command in such international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. Hope it would be helpful while selecting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
school for an aforesaid purpose. If you need any more advice,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
drop me a line.

All the best,

john
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS letter One of your pen friends wants to improve their English at a language school. they have never studied at a language school before and have asked for your advice on how to choose a good one. write a letter to your pen friend. advise them about the following v. 2

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
174 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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