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Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre that it runs, in order to save money. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter1. give details of how you and your friends or family use the centre2. explain why the sports an v.2

Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre that it runs, in order to save money. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter1. give details of how you and your friends or family use the centre2. explain why the sports an v. 2
More and more children are enrolled in educational institutions by their parents so they can be formally trained. Many individuals are of the school of thought that it is the sole responsibility of the parents to bring up their children properly, some others are of the opinion that the mandate lies with the institutes the children attends. This essay will discuss the reasons why bringing up a child properly to be a virtuous global citizen is the duty of the parents. Academic institutions should be able to go beyond the formal education and pass along moral values to students attending their schools because they have more interaction with other students of their age brackets and these takes place mostly at their institutes of formal education. Consequently, these places may be able to use this as an avenue to enforce some discipline. For example, a school in Australia recorded an 11% reduction in the average weight of pupils attending the school when the authorities banned the students from bringing junk food. Instead, they encouraged healthy eating and living by serving vegetarian diet in the academy’s cafeteria. Thus, institutions may have more power to guide young adults than we initially thought. However, placing such responsibility on the school would distract them from their primary purpose, which is to train children formally. Moreover, the parents probably are the first set of individuals a child will come across in life. Therefore, they have an upper hand of moulding their offspring to just the kind of person they would like them to turn out to be in the future. In conclusion, although I think bringing up children is the responsibility of parents, the teachers too have a duty to perform in making sure that the next generation of citizens are good individuals of the society.
More and more
children
are enrolled
in educational institutions by their
parents
so
they can be
formally
trained.
Many
individuals are of the
school
of
thought
that it is the sole responsibility of the
parents
to bring up their
children
properly
,
some
others are of the opinion that the mandate lies with the institutes the
children
attends. This essay will discuss the reasons why bringing up a child
properly
to be a virtuous global citizen is the duty of the parents.

Academic institutions should be able to go beyond the formal education and pass along moral values to students attending their
schools
because
they have more interaction with other students of their age brackets and these takes place
mostly
at their institutes of formal education.
Consequently
, these places may be able to
use
this as an avenue to enforce
some
discipline.
For example
, a
school
in Australia recorded an 11% reduction in the average weight of pupils attending the
school
when the authorities banned the students from bringing junk food.
Instead
, they encouraged healthy eating and living by serving vegetarian diet in the academy’s cafeteria.
Thus
, institutions may have more power to guide young adults than we
initially
thought
.

However
, placing such responsibility on the
school
would distract them from their primary purpose, which is to train
children
formally
.
Moreover
, the
parents
probably
are the
first
set of individuals a child will
come
across in life.
Therefore
, they have an upper hand of
moulding
their offspring to
just
the kind of person they would like them to turn out to be in the future.

In conclusion
, although I
think
bringing up
children
is the responsibility of
parents
, the teachers
too have
a duty to perform in making sure that the
next
generation of citizens are
good
individuals of the society.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS essay Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre that it runs, in order to save money. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter1. give details of how you and your friends or family use the centre2. explain why the sports an v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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